Greetings,
I'm in the midst of total insanity, but all is well, and I look forward to sharing the insights coming from all of this as soon as I recover! But for now, ponder this:
Most of us are trained, and unfortunately limited, to feel a kind of happiness that is based on what's happening to us; Things go well, we get what we want, and we're happy. We don't get what we want, chaos ensues, and we get unhappy.
The key is to realize that there's a more savory kind of happiness that can result from no longer being at the mercy of your emotions and your old programs. You can experience a happiness that comes from a bigger view of how you are creating peace, stability, and an accepting attitude. A satisfaction that's no longer dependent on all the dramas of life, but on the fact that you can handle it all regardless of what's unfolding in front of you. And even more importantly, that you can trust yourself to handle what you're experiencing "emotionally" and "in your mind" as well. There's a natural joy that arises when you no longer feel so threatened by your circumstances, "or", by your complaining mind's negative perspectives.
It's a higher quality and more refined flavor of happiness, because it's based in the truth of who you are. It's coming from your higher wisdom and not from your personalities programmed reactions to the ups and downs of life. It's my heartfelt intention and the purpose of KnowComplaints to offer you a chance to experience this as a possibility. To re-visit the inspirations and tweachings, go to: http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
Here is this week's tweachings:
The same programming has many voices. If everyone could hear our thoughts we'd all be embarrassed, yet we'd understand our common challenge.
You don't really talk yourself into trust and peace. It's where your soul rests when you let go of the story you think you should be living.
Courage doesn't come from talking yourself into strength and confidence. It comes from not caring about how you feel and just going for it.
Our deep fears don't seem to really ever go away. Peace comes from allowing them, dis-believing them, and acting willfully in spite of them.
You can't accurately judge something as "shouldn't have happened", because you can't see the way every detail is going to impact the future.
One moment we can be a victim who feels hurt or the abuser who feels entitled. This dynamic destroys us. Choose compassion and forgiveness.
We tell ourselves that things aren't right and we should be unhappy. This opinion is the source of our misery: Not the situations around us.
Best wishes and peace to you,
Bryan
To receive these inspirations via email: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
bryanzerr copyright 2011
Friday, October 21, 2011
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
The 73rd KnowComplaints Inspiration.
Greetings!
I welcome you back and I apologize for my unpredictable month away. As chaotic and difficult as it's been, it's provided huge insights and a wonderful opportunity for more practice.
Without going in details now, I'm so grateful that the difficulties I've been through did not include mounds of suffering from the complaining mind. It's hard to imagine how much more difficult this would have been, if I were still being so bombarded by all the old negative and fearful programs that use to run me.
I look forward to sharing all the insight that has come, and I have truly missed the chance to write. I'm finally getting back to my KnowComplaints email box after a couple weeks and consider me back in touch!
So while I regain my momentum let me offer you my last couple weeks of tweachings. Coming up next will be an opportunity to hear the broadcast I did in L.A. a couple of Saturday's ago with Dennis Mason, as well as the 74th Inspiration.
Thank you for all you've brought to me through our connection over the last 9 months, and please be in touch as I share more of living life on the journey to Freedom from the complaining, critical and condemning mind.
Peace and best wishes to you!
Bryan
Tweachings:
Life is difficult and we need to stay positive when we're worn down. We can lose our trust when we get exhausted. Just remembering this helps.
Try to let go of always having to say something to yourself. It's an addiction. Rest on your breath and absorb the moment with your senses.
Try to take people to a trusting place. Help yourself and others focus on abundance, instead of lack and resistance. Everyone will benefit.
Imagine how the day would be if every conversation you had was about the grace between the difficulty, and the gifts amidst the chaos.
Complaints come from the belief that you think you know how things should be happening. Every time you complain you distrust life's magic.
Try breathing through every complaint. Catch it as it's coming out of your head and let it go with the trust that it wasn't worth your time.
Allowing and acceptance aren't that difficult. Don't try to convince yourself you like what's happening, just drop the whole story about it.
Think about how things could be better for 10 mins. a day and spend the rest of your time in gratitude. Make changes later and be happy now.
Anytime we feel entitled to hurt someone or treat them badly, it's a huge opportunity to wake up. Bless them and wish them healing instead.
People that complain about complaining people are missing the point. We have to let go of righteous negativity and all the ways it condemns.
It's OK to have a negative opinion, but to remind yourself and everyone else about it over and over again is when it turns into complaining.
Bring "service" into every moment. If you focus on how you're helping others or yourself by what you're doing it naturally brings happiness.
View the KnowComplaints blog with all past inspirations: http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
View past tweets and quotes: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
bryanzerr copyright 2011
I welcome you back and I apologize for my unpredictable month away. As chaotic and difficult as it's been, it's provided huge insights and a wonderful opportunity for more practice.
Without going in details now, I'm so grateful that the difficulties I've been through did not include mounds of suffering from the complaining mind. It's hard to imagine how much more difficult this would have been, if I were still being so bombarded by all the old negative and fearful programs that use to run me.
I look forward to sharing all the insight that has come, and I have truly missed the chance to write. I'm finally getting back to my KnowComplaints email box after a couple weeks and consider me back in touch!
So while I regain my momentum let me offer you my last couple weeks of tweachings. Coming up next will be an opportunity to hear the broadcast I did in L.A. a couple of Saturday's ago with Dennis Mason, as well as the 74th Inspiration.
Thank you for all you've brought to me through our connection over the last 9 months, and please be in touch as I share more of living life on the journey to Freedom from the complaining, critical and condemning mind.
Peace and best wishes to you!
Bryan
Tweachings:
Life is difficult and we need to stay positive when we're worn down. We can lose our trust when we get exhausted. Just remembering this helps.
Try to let go of always having to say something to yourself. It's an addiction. Rest on your breath and absorb the moment with your senses.
Try to take people to a trusting place. Help yourself and others focus on abundance, instead of lack and resistance. Everyone will benefit.
Imagine how the day would be if every conversation you had was about the grace between the difficulty, and the gifts amidst the chaos.
Complaints come from the belief that you think you know how things should be happening. Every time you complain you distrust life's magic.
Try breathing through every complaint. Catch it as it's coming out of your head and let it go with the trust that it wasn't worth your time.
Allowing and acceptance aren't that difficult. Don't try to convince yourself you like what's happening, just drop the whole story about it.
Think about how things could be better for 10 mins. a day and spend the rest of your time in gratitude. Make changes later and be happy now.
Anytime we feel entitled to hurt someone or treat them badly, it's a huge opportunity to wake up. Bless them and wish them healing instead.
People that complain about complaining people are missing the point. We have to let go of righteous negativity and all the ways it condemns.
It's OK to have a negative opinion, but to remind yourself and everyone else about it over and over again is when it turns into complaining.
Bring "service" into every moment. If you focus on how you're helping others or yourself by what you're doing it naturally brings happiness.
View the KnowComplaints blog with all past inspirations: http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
View past tweets and quotes: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
bryanzerr copyright 2011
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Bryan Zerr is going to be a guest on the L.A. based radio show, "Fitness and More with Dennis Mason", on Sept 24th at 10:25 A.M PST.
Greetings,
On Sept. 24th I am a guest on a cool new L.A. Health and Fitness talk show with Dennis Mason called "Fitness and More with Dennis Mason". KnowComplaints is being recognized as a fitness and health program for the mind. I would be honored to have you tune in!
To listen to a call-in talk show with Dennis Masson on Sept, 24th, click here:
Fitness and more with Dennis Mason 10:25 PST Sat. 9/24/2011
or later you can type in: http://www.Fitnessandmoreradio.com
On Sept. 24th I am a guest on a cool new L.A. Health and Fitness talk show with Dennis Mason called "Fitness and More with Dennis Mason". KnowComplaints is being recognized as a fitness and health program for the mind. I would be honored to have you tune in!
To listen to a call-in talk show with Dennis Masson on Sept, 24th, click here:
Fitness and more with Dennis Mason 10:25 PST Sat. 9/24/2011
or later you can type in: http://www.Fitnessandmoreradio.com
Saturday, August 27, 2011
The 71st Inspiration.
Hello again!
My retreat was great but I'm excited to be back! I'm starting with a whole new wave of inspirations. For now, here's last week's Twitter tweachings:
Laugh at absurdity, cherish sincerity, respect difficulty, dismiss negativity, allow unpredictability, accept insecurity & trust possibility.
We miss the satisfaction of the present moment because we're usually treating this moment as a way to get to the next one. What's here now?
If we aren't laughing at the voice in our head we're usually being tortured by it. We have to see the humor and not take it too seriously.
Complaining and resistance is a gritty and abrasive way to push through life. Lubricate your life with acceptance.
Complaining about what you can't change, won't get you any more of what you want than what you have now. Being grateful invites abundance.
Try having a true connection with the next person you have random business with. Ask them how they are before you begin. It changes things.
When your present, you get to watch yourself see what you're going to do next over and over again. It's no wonder we often stay distracted.
I ran into someone who thought second guessing themselves was a bad thing. I think if most of us could keep it down to twice we'd be happy!
Worry is spending a lot of time living in your negative imagination. How many times do we need to watch things work out before we let it go?
Just forgive and bless everyone whenever you feel like complaining. You don't have to feel good about. The power of your intention is enough.
In meditation, you get to just sit and watch yourself complain. When you get bored with yourself, instead of believing yourself, it's working.
My teacher used to say "the mind is a terrible thing to watch". At least you can trust you're not the only one dealing with its craziness.
You can't control your thoughts, but you can control whether you tell yourself a story about them or not. They come and go if you let them.
Do you ever feel like you should be somewhere other than where you are? It's just a program that doesn't see where the moment is taking you.
We're guessing at how much reality we personally create but I sense the power will come only after we find peace with what we already have.
Our complaining mind has us convinced we need to worry about tomorrow. It ruined yesterday the same way.
You're never disconnected from your heart or spirit even though it might feel like it. It's yet another illusion of the mind.
Just explaining life's discomfort isn't complaining, unless you overwork being a victim and need to criticize or condemn what's annoying you.
When you're present you're like a blank chalkboard, waiting for life to write something on you and tell what you're supposed to do next.
Peace to you,
Bryan
View the KnowComplaints blog with all past inspirations: http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
View past tweets and quotes: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
bryanzerr copyright 2011
My retreat was great but I'm excited to be back! I'm starting with a whole new wave of inspirations. For now, here's last week's Twitter tweachings:
Laugh at absurdity, cherish sincerity, respect difficulty, dismiss negativity, allow unpredictability, accept insecurity & trust possibility.
We miss the satisfaction of the present moment because we're usually treating this moment as a way to get to the next one. What's here now?
If we aren't laughing at the voice in our head we're usually being tortured by it. We have to see the humor and not take it too seriously.
Complaining and resistance is a gritty and abrasive way to push through life. Lubricate your life with acceptance.
Complaining about what you can't change, won't get you any more of what you want than what you have now. Being grateful invites abundance.
Try having a true connection with the next person you have random business with. Ask them how they are before you begin. It changes things.
When your present, you get to watch yourself see what you're going to do next over and over again. It's no wonder we often stay distracted.
I ran into someone who thought second guessing themselves was a bad thing. I think if most of us could keep it down to twice we'd be happy!
Worry is spending a lot of time living in your negative imagination. How many times do we need to watch things work out before we let it go?
Just forgive and bless everyone whenever you feel like complaining. You don't have to feel good about. The power of your intention is enough.
In meditation, you get to just sit and watch yourself complain. When you get bored with yourself, instead of believing yourself, it's working.
My teacher used to say "the mind is a terrible thing to watch". At least you can trust you're not the only one dealing with its craziness.
You can't control your thoughts, but you can control whether you tell yourself a story about them or not. They come and go if you let them.
Do you ever feel like you should be somewhere other than where you are? It's just a program that doesn't see where the moment is taking you.
We're guessing at how much reality we personally create but I sense the power will come only after we find peace with what we already have.
Our complaining mind has us convinced we need to worry about tomorrow. It ruined yesterday the same way.
You're never disconnected from your heart or spirit even though it might feel like it. It's yet another illusion of the mind.
Just explaining life's discomfort isn't complaining, unless you overwork being a victim and need to criticize or condemn what's annoying you.
When you're present you're like a blank chalkboard, waiting for life to write something on you and tell what you're supposed to do next.
Peace to you,
Bryan
View the KnowComplaints blog with all past inspirations: http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
View past tweets and quotes: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
bryanzerr copyright 2011
Saturday, August 13, 2011
The 70Th on the Mcgurck effect and how we can be fooled by our mind.
Greetings,
Are you ready to be really blown away? Watching this experiment might do it.
I wish I could watch you watch this clip. I trust this is worth your time because it's crucial to know how capable your mind is of fooling you. It's not even subtly fooling us, but outrageously making us hear what isn't real. It's called the McGurck effect. Watch this 3-minute video and then come back if you would...or feel free to read on and look later, but it's better to watch it now. :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-lN8vWm3m0&feature=player_embedded
This reality bender works every time even though you know you're being fooled. The helplessness you feel is almost embarrassing and certainly humbling. The first thing I thought was, "How often do I get things wrong?" I saw how beautifully this supports the idea of distrusting our thoughts and feelings. No wonder we misunderstand each other all the time. This also explains why it's so difficult to change our feelings even when we realize they don't make sense.
If you're afraid of spiders, no matter how harmless one might be it's unlikely you're going to feel calm about it when it's in your house. You could trying feeling comfortable in spite of your fear, as a practice, but that's a lot to ask of yourself.
As a public speaker, I rarely felt confident and secure even after hundreds of seminars. I had to act like I did, and that was my practice because I "knew" I was capable. Sometimes you have to grab onto your wisdom and let go of all feelings including the occasional panic.
It's difficult to push past feelings, but it gets easier, and when you see how many of your reactions are misleading you, you want to find every misinterpretation possible because you see how much trouble they've caused you.
We're totally capable of taking things the wrong way, so we need to consistently respond to our thoughts and feelings with healthy suspicion. Here's a simple example:
If someone shows up at your door with flowers, you might have a program that goes off and says, "this means he/she loves me", and you will feel very nice. Or you might have an automatic program that says, "This means that they're out to get something from me", and you'll feel suspicious and nervous.
So which reaction makes sense? The one that reflects the truth, but was your initial reaction incorrect? It's always possible we aren't "feeling" the truth. Your feelings might be based in your last experience with someone else and may have nothing to do with this person giving you the flowers. One bad experience can unconsciously create many more because of the memory filter it creates that we see through.
Try to pay attention to what happens in the moment as you react with thoughts and feelings. Decide what really makes sense. Challenge your initial feelings and make sure you're seeing and feeling the truth. Then respond to what you learn.
If you feel loved with the flowers, but realize you have provable reason to distrust this person, remain cautious. If you feel suspicious, and it makes no sense given your history with them, choose trust and enjoy the love.
Of course, if you feel suspicious and they really deserve it, that's fine. And if you feel loved, and they really do love you, that's good too. The problem is when they really love you but you believe your suspicious feelings, or they really want something from you and your good feelings keep you blind. These are the kind of misunderstandings we can avoid.
This sounds so simple but we don't do it because we over-trust our feelings. We're taught to trust them and it's not the best advice. We need to second-guess ourselves, especially when we negatively react to another person. This habit of doubting all of our negativity is what we want to lay down to change our future.
And what you might find, is most people mean no harm and don't want to make us feel bad. Even if they're incompetent, annoying, inconsiderate, or clueless, it's likely not about you and they just aren't seeing beyond their own struggle... Even so...
I know how HARD it is to let our anger and frustration go. It's not easy even though the concepts are simple. I've been battling my critical mind for a couple of days now over a situation where my complaining mind feels victimized and wants to retaliate. But I know better, and letting go and restraining my words are the wise choice.
Restraint is difficult but letting go of this will pay off. I know deeply that "I will not be letting go of anything that I will regret losing later." I've decided to surrender, and I know if I wait, the feelings that want me to attack will go away.
I also have to realize that I'm not going to feel good about this! This is very important. Every time we restrain ourselves and move past our ego we have to be prepared to feel like we've lost, but the fact is we have just gained back our freedom to choose compassion and peace.
The other catch, is that just because you know what the appropriate feeling is to have, like trust or safety in a secure situation, you can't just make yourself feel the way you want on command. The mind won't let you feel what you know is true once again, but in this case it will let you feel safe over time.
I use to rock climb, and even though I knew the ropes would hold a pickup, I still felt terrified dangling 500 feet in the air, no matter what I told myself.
So when it makes sense to let go of your suspicion, you still might feel distrusting. The trust is a decision and you may or may not feel it, but that's OK. Just because you don't feel it, doesn't mean it's the wrong decision. The feelings take time to catch up.
When you forgive someone, the anger may not go away immediately but that doesn't mean you haven't forgiven them. Your wisdom's choice has to be integrated, and again it takes time to feel the compassion.
However this applies, The McGurck effect gives us reason to consciously evaluate why we feel and think what we do. Make conscious hesitation a habit and a style of being. Use your breath to create a gap between feeling and reacting or responding. Find your center when life's moments make you uncomfortable and challenge the way you're thinking. This approach is how we're going to move from being controlled by our negative programming; to living and loving the way we know we can.
Best wishes and feel free to ask a questions at mailto:bryan@bryanzerr.com
Peace to you,
Bryan
bryanzerr copyright 2011
View my blog with everything on it here:http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
View my twitter teachings here: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
Are you ready to be really blown away? Watching this experiment might do it.
I wish I could watch you watch this clip. I trust this is worth your time because it's crucial to know how capable your mind is of fooling you. It's not even subtly fooling us, but outrageously making us hear what isn't real. It's called the McGurck effect. Watch this 3-minute video and then come back if you would...or feel free to read on and look later, but it's better to watch it now. :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-lN8vWm3m0&feature=player_embedded
This reality bender works every time even though you know you're being fooled. The helplessness you feel is almost embarrassing and certainly humbling. The first thing I thought was, "How often do I get things wrong?" I saw how beautifully this supports the idea of distrusting our thoughts and feelings. No wonder we misunderstand each other all the time. This also explains why it's so difficult to change our feelings even when we realize they don't make sense.
If you're afraid of spiders, no matter how harmless one might be it's unlikely you're going to feel calm about it when it's in your house. You could trying feeling comfortable in spite of your fear, as a practice, but that's a lot to ask of yourself.
As a public speaker, I rarely felt confident and secure even after hundreds of seminars. I had to act like I did, and that was my practice because I "knew" I was capable. Sometimes you have to grab onto your wisdom and let go of all feelings including the occasional panic.
It's difficult to push past feelings, but it gets easier, and when you see how many of your reactions are misleading you, you want to find every misinterpretation possible because you see how much trouble they've caused you.
We're totally capable of taking things the wrong way, so we need to consistently respond to our thoughts and feelings with healthy suspicion. Here's a simple example:
If someone shows up at your door with flowers, you might have a program that goes off and says, "this means he/she loves me", and you will feel very nice. Or you might have an automatic program that says, "This means that they're out to get something from me", and you'll feel suspicious and nervous.
So which reaction makes sense? The one that reflects the truth, but was your initial reaction incorrect? It's always possible we aren't "feeling" the truth. Your feelings might be based in your last experience with someone else and may have nothing to do with this person giving you the flowers. One bad experience can unconsciously create many more because of the memory filter it creates that we see through.
Try to pay attention to what happens in the moment as you react with thoughts and feelings. Decide what really makes sense. Challenge your initial feelings and make sure you're seeing and feeling the truth. Then respond to what you learn.
If you feel loved with the flowers, but realize you have provable reason to distrust this person, remain cautious. If you feel suspicious, and it makes no sense given your history with them, choose trust and enjoy the love.
Of course, if you feel suspicious and they really deserve it, that's fine. And if you feel loved, and they really do love you, that's good too. The problem is when they really love you but you believe your suspicious feelings, or they really want something from you and your good feelings keep you blind. These are the kind of misunderstandings we can avoid.
This sounds so simple but we don't do it because we over-trust our feelings. We're taught to trust them and it's not the best advice. We need to second-guess ourselves, especially when we negatively react to another person. This habit of doubting all of our negativity is what we want to lay down to change our future.
And what you might find, is most people mean no harm and don't want to make us feel bad. Even if they're incompetent, annoying, inconsiderate, or clueless, it's likely not about you and they just aren't seeing beyond their own struggle... Even so...
I know how HARD it is to let our anger and frustration go. It's not easy even though the concepts are simple. I've been battling my critical mind for a couple of days now over a situation where my complaining mind feels victimized and wants to retaliate. But I know better, and letting go and restraining my words are the wise choice.
Restraint is difficult but letting go of this will pay off. I know deeply that "I will not be letting go of anything that I will regret losing later." I've decided to surrender, and I know if I wait, the feelings that want me to attack will go away.
I also have to realize that I'm not going to feel good about this! This is very important. Every time we restrain ourselves and move past our ego we have to be prepared to feel like we've lost, but the fact is we have just gained back our freedom to choose compassion and peace.
The other catch, is that just because you know what the appropriate feeling is to have, like trust or safety in a secure situation, you can't just make yourself feel the way you want on command. The mind won't let you feel what you know is true once again, but in this case it will let you feel safe over time.
I use to rock climb, and even though I knew the ropes would hold a pickup, I still felt terrified dangling 500 feet in the air, no matter what I told myself.
So when it makes sense to let go of your suspicion, you still might feel distrusting. The trust is a decision and you may or may not feel it, but that's OK. Just because you don't feel it, doesn't mean it's the wrong decision. The feelings take time to catch up.
When you forgive someone, the anger may not go away immediately but that doesn't mean you haven't forgiven them. Your wisdom's choice has to be integrated, and again it takes time to feel the compassion.
However this applies, The McGurck effect gives us reason to consciously evaluate why we feel and think what we do. Make conscious hesitation a habit and a style of being. Use your breath to create a gap between feeling and reacting or responding. Find your center when life's moments make you uncomfortable and challenge the way you're thinking. This approach is how we're going to move from being controlled by our negative programming; to living and loving the way we know we can.
Best wishes and feel free to ask a questions at mailto:bryan@bryanzerr.com
Peace to you,
Bryan
bryanzerr copyright 2011
View my blog with everything on it here:http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
View my twitter teachings here: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
The 69Th. More Tweachings.
Greetings,
Just to let you know there is a "very curious" inspiration on the way tomorrow.
Here are the published quotes from last week:
To stop your complaints and negative thoughts is very difficult, so just remember they only have as much value as you choose to give them.
5 minutes can make all the difference. My Meditation instructions are from personal experience with traditional teachers. http://dld.bz/Meditate
To meditate is to watch the flow of your thoughts and feelings, meeting them without a need to stop them, judge them, or complain about them.
Once your centered in your breath, you re-arise from it over and over again, always falling back into a flowing and alive state of peace.
If someone makes you complain, try to see him or her as your teacher. Every time you see your complaining mind in action you take its power away.
Maybe the answer to your situation is still coming together. Let the next step come on it's own time and relax. Trust and just be present.
All tweets on KnowComplaints are original messages and teachings by Bryan Zerr, yet any wisdom within is of course eternal.
We need to learn to be more suspicious of our interpretations and less suspicious of each other.
When we let go of the need to make things right or wrong and just try to make things better, we transform our aggression into solutions.
Let go of any feeling or story that wants to punish anyone no matter what makes you feel entitled. Your true heart and self know only love.
Your wisdom can't get through if you're busy giving your attention to your complaints. Trust your complaints are big part of the problem and let them go.
It's unconsciousness and ignorance that need to be attacked, not the people who express them. Can we care instead of letting our critical mind take over?
When something doesn't happen it literally re-arranges your entire future chain of events. Your unmet desire may bring amazing unpredictable gifts.
Peace to you,
Bryan
See my blog with everything on it here:http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
See my twitter teachings here: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
bryanzerr copyright 2011
Just to let you know there is a "very curious" inspiration on the way tomorrow.
Here are the published quotes from last week:
To stop your complaints and negative thoughts is very difficult, so just remember they only have as much value as you choose to give them.
5 minutes can make all the difference. My Meditation instructions are from personal experience with traditional teachers. http://dld.bz/Meditate
To meditate is to watch the flow of your thoughts and feelings, meeting them without a need to stop them, judge them, or complain about them.
Once your centered in your breath, you re-arise from it over and over again, always falling back into a flowing and alive state of peace.
If someone makes you complain, try to see him or her as your teacher. Every time you see your complaining mind in action you take its power away.
Maybe the answer to your situation is still coming together. Let the next step come on it's own time and relax. Trust and just be present.
All tweets on KnowComplaints are original messages and teachings by Bryan Zerr, yet any wisdom within is of course eternal.
We need to learn to be more suspicious of our interpretations and less suspicious of each other.
When we let go of the need to make things right or wrong and just try to make things better, we transform our aggression into solutions.
Let go of any feeling or story that wants to punish anyone no matter what makes you feel entitled. Your true heart and self know only love.
Your wisdom can't get through if you're busy giving your attention to your complaints. Trust your complaints are big part of the problem and let them go.
It's unconsciousness and ignorance that need to be attacked, not the people who express them. Can we care instead of letting our critical mind take over?
When something doesn't happen it literally re-arranges your entire future chain of events. Your unmet desire may bring amazing unpredictable gifts.
Peace to you,
Bryan
See my blog with everything on it here:http://bryanzerr.blogspot.com
See my twitter teachings here: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
Receive these inspirations via email here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
bryanzerr copyright 2011
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
The 68th. More quotes.
Greetings,
This week's Twitter teachings:
5 people complained to me yesterday about other people. Are we the "other people" ? Somebody is. If we could all just be a kinder it would change.
Hope has power or it can create attachment and suffering depending on your attitude. I like to think of it as having my fantasies encouraged.
The word "simple" takes on a new meaning when you truly see how the complaining mind has been complicating things. Try to simply just be here a 1000x a day.
Without shame we just pick ourselves up and go onto the next choice. Feeling bad just blocks us from the wisdom that shows us what we need to change.
If you find yourself being drawn into negative story by your complaining mind let your it take you back to what's positive. Your breath is so powerful.
Our unnoticed complaining mind's programs use our present moment intelligence to construct inner stories that focus on how everything sucks.
The inner voice or critic can have a very obsessive style. Turn this way that your mind is shaped into a skill. Be obsessed with gratitude.
If we feel like blaming others it's often because we haven't forgiven ourselves for the past, where we also see that we could've been better. Our authentic self
When you let go of your complaining feelings and extend yourself kindly instead, you aren't giving up anything that you will value later.
Our negative programming uses our voice to tell us distrusting stories about what other people feel and think, and then we painstakingly believe them.
People don't choose to make mistakes. Look back at your least favorite moments. You would've been better if you could've been right? We all deserve forgiveness.
When a story is encouraged and it looks like we might get our way it's partnered with the fear we won't, so maybe we're better without one.
Trust is facing the future as blindly present and storyless as possible, with no need to know what's next because you trust you can handle it.
It's unconsciousness and ignorance that need to be rejected, not the people who are victim's to them. Can we care instead of complain and criticize?
Trust the timing. When something doesn't happen it rearranges your entire future chain of events. Your unmet desire may bring amazing gifts.
There's a committee in my head and each one has their own opinion when something happens about how I should feel. Figuring out which one is telling the truth is the challenge.
You experience many good things but let the moments go by too quickly. Rest in the good moments. We usually give most our time to our fears.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To receive these inspirations click here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
To see the initial invite/oath click here:http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/newsletter.asp?article=8
bryanzerr copyright 2011
This week's Twitter teachings:
5 people complained to me yesterday about other people. Are we the "other people" ? Somebody is. If we could all just be a kinder it would change.
Hope has power or it can create attachment and suffering depending on your attitude. I like to think of it as having my fantasies encouraged.
The word "simple" takes on a new meaning when you truly see how the complaining mind has been complicating things. Try to simply just be here a 1000x a day.
Without shame we just pick ourselves up and go onto the next choice. Feeling bad just blocks us from the wisdom that shows us what we need to change.
If you find yourself being drawn into negative story by your complaining mind let your it take you back to what's positive. Your breath is so powerful.
Our unnoticed complaining mind's programs use our present moment intelligence to construct inner stories that focus on how everything sucks.
The inner voice or critic can have a very obsessive style. Turn this way that your mind is shaped into a skill. Be obsessed with gratitude.
If we feel like blaming others it's often because we haven't forgiven ourselves for the past, where we also see that we could've been better. Our authentic self
When you let go of your complaining feelings and extend yourself kindly instead, you aren't giving up anything that you will value later.
Our negative programming uses our voice to tell us distrusting stories about what other people feel and think, and then we painstakingly believe them.
People don't choose to make mistakes. Look back at your least favorite moments. You would've been better if you could've been right? We all deserve forgiveness.
When a story is encouraged and it looks like we might get our way it's partnered with the fear we won't, so maybe we're better without one.
Trust is facing the future as blindly present and storyless as possible, with no need to know what's next because you trust you can handle it.
It's unconsciousness and ignorance that need to be rejected, not the people who are victim's to them. Can we care instead of complain and criticize?
Trust the timing. When something doesn't happen it rearranges your entire future chain of events. Your unmet desire may bring amazing gifts.
There's a committee in my head and each one has their own opinion when something happens about how I should feel. Figuring out which one is telling the truth is the challenge.
You experience many good things but let the moments go by too quickly. Rest in the good moments. We usually give most our time to our fears.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To receive these inspirations click here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
To see the initial invite/oath click here:http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/newsletter.asp?article=8
bryanzerr copyright 2011
Saturday, July 30, 2011
The 67th Inspiration. Mindfulness and Equanimity
Hello everyone!
Many of you don't know about my quotes. To read them you don't need to sign up or have an account. All 240 are listed at: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
These inspirations are also now in a blog at: http://visit-knowcomplaints.blogspot.com/. It's an easy way to share all 67 of them.
Greetings,
As your complaining stories go away, one change that typically happens is you simply end up being more present. There's a lot less going on in your mind without you're inner critic's drama and all it's opinions. There's extra space in your awareness that allows you to focus more intensely on what arises in the present moment, which includes the sensations of your emotions.
If you're having a nice feeling it's more delicious and enjoyable, but if it's a difficult emotion it will also be experienced more deeply. You'll have a more intimate, intense and complete experience of every emotion but also have the skills to handle it. You can be experiencing overwhelming panic but simultaneously recognizes it as an exaggeration. This kind of clarity is a life changing advantage and potentially everyone can cultivate it.
Staying objective and willing to disregard a feeling in a moments notice, takes the threat and the usual impact of disturbing emotions away. If shame or embarrassment come along you can just step out of their way or just get curious about them. I thank my shadow for sharing, take a breath, immediately choose to love myself, and then either examine it or move on.
So in this process of becoming more conscious, your feelings become impressively stronger but you also have a greater ability to transcend, transmute and move past them more quickly. They can go as fast as they came, and you can remain peaceful and confident as you watch the whole process happen. You stay centered in your wisdom and maintain your emotional equanimity as you experience life more deeply.
This is all possible down the road as you develop enough comfort with discomfort (equanimity), and enough awareness to be mindful of whatever thoughts and feelings you have at any given time. Meditation is a great way to develop both of these skills and with this kind of presence every challenge becomes an opportunity to become more liberated from your negativity.
A formula from one of my teachers, Shinzen Young, is; " Take any situation, bring mindfulness and equanimity to it, and as a result you'll gain insight and purify the fabric of your consciousness. Love it!
Life + Mindfulness & Equanimity = Purification & Insight.
This is a great way to remember the elements of this practice.
My intent with this has been to give you insight into the possibilities and encourage you to keep trying to practice these ideas. This is just one more piece of the puzzle. If you can remember to bring mindfulness and equanimity to any moment it will already have changed it for the better.
Enjoy your weekend and I invite you to spend some time creating inner peace.
Best wishes to you,
Bryan
To receive these inspirations click here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
To see the initial invite/oath click here:http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/newsletter.asp?article=8
bryanzerr copyright 2011
Many of you don't know about my quotes. To read them you don't need to sign up or have an account. All 240 are listed at: http://twitter.com/#!/KnowComplaints
These inspirations are also now in a blog at: http://visit-knowcomplaints.blogspot.com/. It's an easy way to share all 67 of them.
Greetings,
As your complaining stories go away, one change that typically happens is you simply end up being more present. There's a lot less going on in your mind without you're inner critic's drama and all it's opinions. There's extra space in your awareness that allows you to focus more intensely on what arises in the present moment, which includes the sensations of your emotions.
If you're having a nice feeling it's more delicious and enjoyable, but if it's a difficult emotion it will also be experienced more deeply. You'll have a more intimate, intense and complete experience of every emotion but also have the skills to handle it. You can be experiencing overwhelming panic but simultaneously recognizes it as an exaggeration. This kind of clarity is a life changing advantage and potentially everyone can cultivate it.
Staying objective and willing to disregard a feeling in a moments notice, takes the threat and the usual impact of disturbing emotions away. If shame or embarrassment come along you can just step out of their way or just get curious about them. I thank my shadow for sharing, take a breath, immediately choose to love myself, and then either examine it or move on.
So in this process of becoming more conscious, your feelings become impressively stronger but you also have a greater ability to transcend, transmute and move past them more quickly. They can go as fast as they came, and you can remain peaceful and confident as you watch the whole process happen. You stay centered in your wisdom and maintain your emotional equanimity as you experience life more deeply.
This is all possible down the road as you develop enough comfort with discomfort (equanimity), and enough awareness to be mindful of whatever thoughts and feelings you have at any given time. Meditation is a great way to develop both of these skills and with this kind of presence every challenge becomes an opportunity to become more liberated from your negativity.
A formula from one of my teachers, Shinzen Young, is; " Take any situation, bring mindfulness and equanimity to it, and as a result you'll gain insight and purify the fabric of your consciousness. Love it!
Life + Mindfulness & Equanimity = Purification & Insight.
This is a great way to remember the elements of this practice.
My intent with this has been to give you insight into the possibilities and encourage you to keep trying to practice these ideas. This is just one more piece of the puzzle. If you can remember to bring mindfulness and equanimity to any moment it will already have changed it for the better.
Enjoy your weekend and I invite you to spend some time creating inner peace.
Best wishes to you,
Bryan
To receive these inspirations click here: http://www.bryanzerr.com/newspad/sign_up.asp
To see the initial invite/oath click here:http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/newsletter.asp?article=8
bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 66Th. Desperate and and happy at the same time.
Greetings,
It's been so crazy, but I'm amazed that one can feel so desperate and happy at the same time. I have always heard you can have happiness beyond circumstances but it never made sense. I couldn't grasp it because the old way that I used to get happy was about getting things, and the new happiness comes from being able to let everything go.
There seems to be different levels of happiness. There's a happiness dependent on how things are working out, and a happiness that depends on the fact that no matter how things are working out you remain grounded in trust, love, gratitude and sensible optimism. We're content and trusting because we're constantly mindful of the bigger view that gives us the ability to transcend our complaining mind's thoughts and feelings.
I never thought that it could be real or that this kind of happiness would feel as good as "getting something" like a relationship or a nice house. Life's pleasures and good fortunes are still highly appreciated but from a different place. You can enjoy them on a whole new level because you don't need things to go a certain way to make you happy. It would be nice, but there's a confidence you'll manage regardless, and you'll be able to find the beauty around you no matter what 's going down. Everything is more of a gift to be grateful for instead of something you "had to get" to feel good about your life.
The experience of being able to let go and dance lightly through all the egoic-shadow craziness that one is exposed to all day, is so much better and so much more valuable than anything material or circumstantial. In retrospect I'm not sure I really ever enjoyed many things in my life before. Pleasures were more of just a way to escape my craziness or find some kind of relief. I thought relief was a positive feeling but it's really just the absence of an uncomfortable one.
Now it feels like I can access a level of appreciation and gratitude that is almost overwhelming. It's not always there but it is more constant than ever, between and even behind the moments of consciously managing thought and feeling.
A dear friend of mine has just has just burst into the same experience and to talk about life with him sounds insane. We're giddy about how amazing everything is because when you're not fighting your mind, what's around you can be seen differently. Things appear more beautiful, fascinating and sacred.
His breakthrough has been fascinating to watch because it's like a part of him was gathering wisdom and gaining momentum without letting anyone in on it, including his own awareness, and then one day he just stepped out of his complaining, tortured self and said, "Wow I don't have to do this anymore." After years of listening and not really being able to respond to the wisdom he was hearing, he was suddenly released and it all made sense.
And the releases will continue with more levels of awareness, but once you taste the happiness that comes from no longer needing "anything" other than what you already have, you just want more freedom. The scales tip in the other direction and all of a sudden you feel the aliveness and joy that come from resting in what seems like a very natural state of acceptance. You've been reunited with your authentic self.
Please keep challenging your random thoughts and feelings. The release and freedom happen every time you recognize your negativity and walk away from it. Just because these programs are using your voice they're not the authentic you. As you expose the impostor of your complaining mind, your heart and wisdom become more available to you and a new kind of happiness and contentment just might fill your soul.
Best wishes for peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
It's been so crazy, but I'm amazed that one can feel so desperate and happy at the same time. I have always heard you can have happiness beyond circumstances but it never made sense. I couldn't grasp it because the old way that I used to get happy was about getting things, and the new happiness comes from being able to let everything go.
There seems to be different levels of happiness. There's a happiness dependent on how things are working out, and a happiness that depends on the fact that no matter how things are working out you remain grounded in trust, love, gratitude and sensible optimism. We're content and trusting because we're constantly mindful of the bigger view that gives us the ability to transcend our complaining mind's thoughts and feelings.
I never thought that it could be real or that this kind of happiness would feel as good as "getting something" like a relationship or a nice house. Life's pleasures and good fortunes are still highly appreciated but from a different place. You can enjoy them on a whole new level because you don't need things to go a certain way to make you happy. It would be nice, but there's a confidence you'll manage regardless, and you'll be able to find the beauty around you no matter what 's going down. Everything is more of a gift to be grateful for instead of something you "had to get" to feel good about your life.
The experience of being able to let go and dance lightly through all the egoic-shadow craziness that one is exposed to all day, is so much better and so much more valuable than anything material or circumstantial. In retrospect I'm not sure I really ever enjoyed many things in my life before. Pleasures were more of just a way to escape my craziness or find some kind of relief. I thought relief was a positive feeling but it's really just the absence of an uncomfortable one.
Now it feels like I can access a level of appreciation and gratitude that is almost overwhelming. It's not always there but it is more constant than ever, between and even behind the moments of consciously managing thought and feeling.
A dear friend of mine has just has just burst into the same experience and to talk about life with him sounds insane. We're giddy about how amazing everything is because when you're not fighting your mind, what's around you can be seen differently. Things appear more beautiful, fascinating and sacred.
His breakthrough has been fascinating to watch because it's like a part of him was gathering wisdom and gaining momentum without letting anyone in on it, including his own awareness, and then one day he just stepped out of his complaining, tortured self and said, "Wow I don't have to do this anymore." After years of listening and not really being able to respond to the wisdom he was hearing, he was suddenly released and it all made sense.
And the releases will continue with more levels of awareness, but once you taste the happiness that comes from no longer needing "anything" other than what you already have, you just want more freedom. The scales tip in the other direction and all of a sudden you feel the aliveness and joy that come from resting in what seems like a very natural state of acceptance. You've been reunited with your authentic self.
Please keep challenging your random thoughts and feelings. The release and freedom happen every time you recognize your negativity and walk away from it. Just because these programs are using your voice they're not the authentic you. As you expose the impostor of your complaining mind, your heart and wisdom become more available to you and a new kind of happiness and contentment just might fill your soul.
Best wishes for peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Monday, July 25, 2011
The 65Th. More quotes.
Greetings,
More inspirations on the way!
I actually heard a random stranger in a parking lot tell someone on the phone that what he was hearing was just a story. We're waking up!
Why the universe exists is interesting but the biggest mystery is why we can't find peace and happiness when we have so much to grateful for
If someone makes a mistake, it doesn't mean they don't care. No matter how much we love someone it's just impossible to always get it right.
Your thoughts really aren't the problem. True peace and healing comes when you can just watch them and not really care too much about them. Rest in your wisdom.
If you really want trust with someone let them know you aren't going to punish or blame them if they screw up and that you can be forgiving.
Very often we don't have enough information about how and what another person is thinking or feeling, but we believe our reactions anyway.
What's wrong with this moment might be that you're making it wrong. What if you just opened up to see what else the situation has to offer?
If you're complaining just remember that if this moment wasn't happening this way the next one wouldn't either, and it might be a miracle.
We really need to remember not to take ourselves so seriously. Thank God we're finally laughing at our crazy minds. We're finally waking up.
You're not approving of anything when you let go of your complaints, you're just meeting what's in front of you with a sane perspective.
Acceptance, letting go, giving in, equanimity, allowing, releasing, relaxing, surrender, peace. These are what give us power to make change.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
More inspirations on the way!
I actually heard a random stranger in a parking lot tell someone on the phone that what he was hearing was just a story. We're waking up!
Why the universe exists is interesting but the biggest mystery is why we can't find peace and happiness when we have so much to grateful for
If someone makes a mistake, it doesn't mean they don't care. No matter how much we love someone it's just impossible to always get it right.
Your thoughts really aren't the problem. True peace and healing comes when you can just watch them and not really care too much about them. Rest in your wisdom.
If you really want trust with someone let them know you aren't going to punish or blame them if they screw up and that you can be forgiving.
Very often we don't have enough information about how and what another person is thinking or feeling, but we believe our reactions anyway.
What's wrong with this moment might be that you're making it wrong. What if you just opened up to see what else the situation has to offer?
If you're complaining just remember that if this moment wasn't happening this way the next one wouldn't either, and it might be a miracle.
We really need to remember not to take ourselves so seriously. Thank God we're finally laughing at our crazy minds. We're finally waking up.
You're not approving of anything when you let go of your complaints, you're just meeting what's in front of you with a sane perspective.
Acceptance, letting go, giving in, equanimity, allowing, releasing, relaxing, surrender, peace. These are what give us power to make change.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 64Th. More quotes.
Greetings,
A few thoughts from the week;
You're not approving of anything when you let go of your complaints, your just meeting what's in front of you with a sane perspective.
Acceptance, letting go, giving in, equanimity, allowing, releasing, relaxing, surrender, peace. These are what give us power to make change.
A sweet surrender comes from having a healthy relationship with your "wanting". You just stay open, and see if life has a better suggestion.
You're good enough. He's good enough, She's good enough, it's good enough and so is this moment. "Good enough" is the essence of acceptance. If it isn't good enough, then change it, but accept it in the meantime.
Find a place to sit and do nothing. Breathe. See what's happening inside and get some space around your stories. Life's a lot better without most of them.
Liberation is when the light of your awareness shows you that all your negativity is a misunderstanding, and you never, ever forget it.
If you do think about the future, make up something that feels good. Our stories rarely turn out true, so why not assume something positive?
There's hardly anything more satisfying than offering people your presence without any judgment. When your complaining mind stops you shine.
This experience is phenomenal if you're not trying to get it to do what you want. Just watch. Isn't it amazing that all this is happening?
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
A few thoughts from the week;
You're not approving of anything when you let go of your complaints, your just meeting what's in front of you with a sane perspective.
Acceptance, letting go, giving in, equanimity, allowing, releasing, relaxing, surrender, peace. These are what give us power to make change.
A sweet surrender comes from having a healthy relationship with your "wanting". You just stay open, and see if life has a better suggestion.
You're good enough. He's good enough, She's good enough, it's good enough and so is this moment. "Good enough" is the essence of acceptance. If it isn't good enough, then change it, but accept it in the meantime.
Find a place to sit and do nothing. Breathe. See what's happening inside and get some space around your stories. Life's a lot better without most of them.
Liberation is when the light of your awareness shows you that all your negativity is a misunderstanding, and you never, ever forget it.
If you do think about the future, make up something that feels good. Our stories rarely turn out true, so why not assume something positive?
There's hardly anything more satisfying than offering people your presence without any judgment. When your complaining mind stops you shine.
This experience is phenomenal if you're not trying to get it to do what you want. Just watch. Isn't it amazing that all this is happening?
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
The 63rd. The mystery and potential of waking up.
Greetings,
Here we are in the second stage of KnowComplaints. It's been six months and I'm wondering how everyone is doing? Please feel free to share if you haven't already. Personally it has been the best one of the best experiences of my life. Thank you for your attention and encouragement.
People who don't know me, ask me why I am spending all this time on a project that isn't designed or intended to make money. I can't seem to successfully convince people how good it feels to do service, and how meaningful it is to support people in finding freedom.
I'm happy to say there's been lots of progress for many people and even profound breakthroughs. To me there's hardly anything more rewarding than to see someone deeply realize they've been at the mercy of the complaining mind their whole life. When we see we're not our shadows or our negative thoughts and emotions, this is the turning point where all the confusion gets cleared up. The release from the guilt, shame and overall critical craziness, is the moment when life becomes worth living for many people.
What it takes to get there is a mystery. I've known people who for years that seemed to make no progress and then just one day it all makes sense. Others make slow steady progress, and others have dramatic swings from amazing freedom, to deep self-loathing and back again until they stabilize. The bottom line is once you see this truth and commit to disbelieving your shadow, you just have to keep practicing until your awareness of this truth is constant and the mystery releases you.
I do this because the reward of potentially offering someone a new life is so meaningful. To watch someone free him or herself from self-hate and be reborn is ecstatic. For me life has boiled down to two things: Play and service and they don't exclude each other. My goal is to fully appreciate and enjoy the gifts of this world, and be a positive force in creating the highest potential for myself and everyone else here.
Things get simple and clear when you're no longer spending all your waking hours looking to satisfy the ego's needs for control, security and approval. All those conversations you have to have with yourself to feel better, don't have to happen any more because you're no longer complicating life with all those stories. You can rest and exist in a place of love and trust, and when you do; there is a clarity about how to meet each moment that just lets you relax, play, and care for others.
So thank you for helping me find my voice, and with deep gratitude and appreciation these inspirations will continue. And I send a sincere apologies to my dear friends who I am not reaching out to as much as this journey unfolds. Thank you for your love, patience and support.
If you'd like to share KnowComplaints as a part of your service to others; the inspirations, tweets, etc. are now available for viewing all in one place at: http://visit-knowcomplaints.blogspot.com/
Wishes for peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Here we are in the second stage of KnowComplaints. It's been six months and I'm wondering how everyone is doing? Please feel free to share if you haven't already. Personally it has been the best one of the best experiences of my life. Thank you for your attention and encouragement.
People who don't know me, ask me why I am spending all this time on a project that isn't designed or intended to make money. I can't seem to successfully convince people how good it feels to do service, and how meaningful it is to support people in finding freedom.
I'm happy to say there's been lots of progress for many people and even profound breakthroughs. To me there's hardly anything more rewarding than to see someone deeply realize they've been at the mercy of the complaining mind their whole life. When we see we're not our shadows or our negative thoughts and emotions, this is the turning point where all the confusion gets cleared up. The release from the guilt, shame and overall critical craziness, is the moment when life becomes worth living for many people.
What it takes to get there is a mystery. I've known people who for years that seemed to make no progress and then just one day it all makes sense. Others make slow steady progress, and others have dramatic swings from amazing freedom, to deep self-loathing and back again until they stabilize. The bottom line is once you see this truth and commit to disbelieving your shadow, you just have to keep practicing until your awareness of this truth is constant and the mystery releases you.
I do this because the reward of potentially offering someone a new life is so meaningful. To watch someone free him or herself from self-hate and be reborn is ecstatic. For me life has boiled down to two things: Play and service and they don't exclude each other. My goal is to fully appreciate and enjoy the gifts of this world, and be a positive force in creating the highest potential for myself and everyone else here.
Things get simple and clear when you're no longer spending all your waking hours looking to satisfy the ego's needs for control, security and approval. All those conversations you have to have with yourself to feel better, don't have to happen any more because you're no longer complicating life with all those stories. You can rest and exist in a place of love and trust, and when you do; there is a clarity about how to meet each moment that just lets you relax, play, and care for others.
So thank you for helping me find my voice, and with deep gratitude and appreciation these inspirations will continue. And I send a sincere apologies to my dear friends who I am not reaching out to as much as this journey unfolds. Thank you for your love, patience and support.
If you'd like to share KnowComplaints as a part of your service to others; the inspirations, tweets, etc. are now available for viewing all in one place at: http://visit-knowcomplaints.blogspot.com/
Wishes for peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Sunday, July 10, 2011
The 62nd. Quotes
Greetings!
Thoughts from the week:
My dog thinks everything that moves is alive. She doesn't realize that wind can push things around. It must feel very crowded on windy days.
Meditation can get you comfortable "enough" with all the feelings you've ever had related to all you've ever experienced. That's equanimity.
Imagine you're doing everything for the first time and let go of old impressions. If you're present and curious a whole new view is possible.
I recently discovered I had driven by a 7 ft. plaster rooster almost twice a day for 5 years without seeing it before. That's an eye opener! What are you missing?
When we're impatient, we're "everywhere" else but here. Stop waiting. Be present and respect the mystery of the moment. Look for the gift.
Your can either meet the moment consciously, aware, and mindful, or live in the trance of being pushed around by your thoughts and feelings.
Allow your wisdom to be critical and judgmental. "Really". It's how we make decisions! Just don't disrespect what you don't like or want.
Freedom is being able to respond to others and yourself with wisdom, compassion, & loving-kindness no matter what feelings want to stop you.
Just assume everyone has a crazy shadow that can overtake them and make them do things you're not going to like. It makes it less personal.
Try just moving through the day without an opinion about anything. Try it for just one minute. Do you see how much of life is in your head?
Wishing you a mindful weekend. I invite you to consider meditating this weekend?
To view meditation instructions:http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/newsletter.asp?article=27
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Thoughts from the week:
My dog thinks everything that moves is alive. She doesn't realize that wind can push things around. It must feel very crowded on windy days.
Meditation can get you comfortable "enough" with all the feelings you've ever had related to all you've ever experienced. That's equanimity.
Imagine you're doing everything for the first time and let go of old impressions. If you're present and curious a whole new view is possible.
I recently discovered I had driven by a 7 ft. plaster rooster almost twice a day for 5 years without seeing it before. That's an eye opener! What are you missing?
When we're impatient, we're "everywhere" else but here. Stop waiting. Be present and respect the mystery of the moment. Look for the gift.
Your can either meet the moment consciously, aware, and mindful, or live in the trance of being pushed around by your thoughts and feelings.
Allow your wisdom to be critical and judgmental. "Really". It's how we make decisions! Just don't disrespect what you don't like or want.
Freedom is being able to respond to others and yourself with wisdom, compassion, & loving-kindness no matter what feelings want to stop you.
Just assume everyone has a crazy shadow that can overtake them and make them do things you're not going to like. It makes it less personal.
Try just moving through the day without an opinion about anything. Try it for just one minute. Do you see how much of life is in your head?
Wishing you a mindful weekend. I invite you to consider meditating this weekend?
To view meditation instructions:http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/newsletter.asp?article=27
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
The 61st. Practicing with thorns and other people's complaining minds.
Greetings,
Well at least I was stuck by a thorn last week and not by my complaining mind. It would've been so much worse! The event was a gift, because it was yet another perfect teacher and opportunity to practice emotional composure, (equanimity), and working with my mind. I was actually excited about the challenge and took it on consciously.
I was doing great with it until I found myself talking to other people and having to explain myself. I didn't mind sharing the main event but everyone wanted the details. What works for me would be a quick moment of deep compassion, concern and empathy, then maybe some laughter and let's move on... but that wasn't what was happening.
If you want to see how someone's complaining mind works, give them something to complain about. Better yet make it "your" issue and see how their shadow will take it and run. I'm learning to be very careful about expressing what's going on in my life because other people suffer over it more than I do. I don't want them to experience it as if it happened to them, which is what happens as they imagine it, and I personally don't want to get sucked into the drama. What it really feels like is I don't want to get bludgeoned by my own fear.
When other people get upset like we could have, we relate. We evoke fear in each other as we express our own and this pattern keeps us stuck. We do this to each other unconsciously all the time, and if we're aware of it we can change it.
I've also learned not to try and talk people out of "your" suffering. Trying to convince them your peaceful in an uncomfortable time is often too big of a conversation for the moment. I find it best to just agree it's tough, say something reassuring, and then try to change the subject. If that works, great: but normally it doesn't. I like to count how many times someone will try to take me back to my suffering and not let me change the subject.
A helpful remedy at this point is to ask how they're doing personally? How are they handling the situation? What can you do for them? This brings both of you back to moment and into support, instead of focusing on the circumstances. I think deep inside people want to be seen with your presence rather than have their stories heard.
Just a note: I find it fascinating, that this is the same strategy I would suggest using with yourself when your own tragedy arises. Don't fuel your "own" stories and offer yourself comfort and compassion instead.
Last week was a great opportunity for me to practice all of this:
I knew the chance of an infection was high, but I wasn't going into fearful or complaining places about it. I wasn't "waiting" in fear. I was staying present and curious. The words of Ekhardt Tolle reminded me, "There's no such thing as waiting if you're in the present moment." All was going really well until my friend called, or shall I say her complaining mind called. LOL.
She started with "How's your foot?" and within seconds she was telling me I might lose it! Then she feverishly launched into this story about her friend who stepped on a nail, and if he had been to the doctor an hour later, blah, blah, blah...
I felt like I was drowning and I finally just I screamed out, "STOP!" There was a moment of silence then I said, "Can you please just take me to a happy place?" We both rolled in laughter as she once again saw her silly complaining minds pattern.
I invite you to challenge yourself to watch how you lead conversations, and watch others as well. If you notice either of you are going down that old fearful road, practice bringing everyone back to a more peaceful and positive attitude. Focus on positive possibilities. "Take us to a happy place."
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Well at least I was stuck by a thorn last week and not by my complaining mind. It would've been so much worse! The event was a gift, because it was yet another perfect teacher and opportunity to practice emotional composure, (equanimity), and working with my mind. I was actually excited about the challenge and took it on consciously.
I was doing great with it until I found myself talking to other people and having to explain myself. I didn't mind sharing the main event but everyone wanted the details. What works for me would be a quick moment of deep compassion, concern and empathy, then maybe some laughter and let's move on... but that wasn't what was happening.
If you want to see how someone's complaining mind works, give them something to complain about. Better yet make it "your" issue and see how their shadow will take it and run. I'm learning to be very careful about expressing what's going on in my life because other people suffer over it more than I do. I don't want them to experience it as if it happened to them, which is what happens as they imagine it, and I personally don't want to get sucked into the drama. What it really feels like is I don't want to get bludgeoned by my own fear.
When other people get upset like we could have, we relate. We evoke fear in each other as we express our own and this pattern keeps us stuck. We do this to each other unconsciously all the time, and if we're aware of it we can change it.
I've also learned not to try and talk people out of "your" suffering. Trying to convince them your peaceful in an uncomfortable time is often too big of a conversation for the moment. I find it best to just agree it's tough, say something reassuring, and then try to change the subject. If that works, great: but normally it doesn't. I like to count how many times someone will try to take me back to my suffering and not let me change the subject.
A helpful remedy at this point is to ask how they're doing personally? How are they handling the situation? What can you do for them? This brings both of you back to moment and into support, instead of focusing on the circumstances. I think deep inside people want to be seen with your presence rather than have their stories heard.
Just a note: I find it fascinating, that this is the same strategy I would suggest using with yourself when your own tragedy arises. Don't fuel your "own" stories and offer yourself comfort and compassion instead.
Last week was a great opportunity for me to practice all of this:
I knew the chance of an infection was high, but I wasn't going into fearful or complaining places about it. I wasn't "waiting" in fear. I was staying present and curious. The words of Ekhardt Tolle reminded me, "There's no such thing as waiting if you're in the present moment." All was going really well until my friend called, or shall I say her complaining mind called. LOL.
She started with "How's your foot?" and within seconds she was telling me I might lose it! Then she feverishly launched into this story about her friend who stepped on a nail, and if he had been to the doctor an hour later, blah, blah, blah...
I felt like I was drowning and I finally just I screamed out, "STOP!" There was a moment of silence then I said, "Can you please just take me to a happy place?" We both rolled in laughter as she once again saw her silly complaining minds pattern.
I invite you to challenge yourself to watch how you lead conversations, and watch others as well. If you notice either of you are going down that old fearful road, practice bringing everyone back to a more peaceful and positive attitude. Focus on positive possibilities. "Take us to a happy place."
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Sunday, July 3, 2011
The 60Th Inspiration. Quotes.
Greetings,
To be clear about the last inspiration... I was ending my tragic love affair with the "Bougainvillea", not the neighbor! Thank you Steve.:) My neighbor is wonderful, and the hospital story I will save for another day. All is good enough!
A few things to consider:
If your complaining mind is making up negative stories, you can replace them, ignore them, or stop them if you have enough presence.
We aren't a reliable source when it comes to why people do things. Ask if you need to know why, and be kind if your going to make it up.
Try to breathe through your complaints. The attention on your breath interrupts your story just long enough for you to step in and let go.
Once you stop punishing yourself for making mistakes, the trick is to get everyone else to go along with the program. We deserve forgiveness.
It seems counter intuitive, but how a feeling feels is actually beside the point. What's important is whether or not it makes sense.
If you're caught in stress, ask yourself, "What's wrong with this moment, aside from any fear I have about the future?" Possibly not much. Relax.
Your inner complaining critic is just an old defensive program that gets expressed using YOUR voice and personality. You aren't the problem.
Peace and presence to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
To be clear about the last inspiration... I was ending my tragic love affair with the "Bougainvillea", not the neighbor! Thank you Steve.:) My neighbor is wonderful, and the hospital story I will save for another day. All is good enough!
A few things to consider:
If your complaining mind is making up negative stories, you can replace them, ignore them, or stop them if you have enough presence.
We aren't a reliable source when it comes to why people do things. Ask if you need to know why, and be kind if your going to make it up.
Try to breathe through your complaints. The attention on your breath interrupts your story just long enough for you to step in and let go.
Once you stop punishing yourself for making mistakes, the trick is to get everyone else to go along with the program. We deserve forgiveness.
It seems counter intuitive, but how a feeling feels is actually beside the point. What's important is whether or not it makes sense.
If you're caught in stress, ask yourself, "What's wrong with this moment, aside from any fear I have about the future?" Possibly not much. Relax.
Your inner complaining critic is just an old defensive program that gets expressed using YOUR voice and personality. You aren't the problem.
Peace and presence to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
The 59h. What if you were in love with every moment?
Greetings,
What if you could face the world as if you were "in love"? What if you treated the moment in front of you as if it were something you cherished? What if you were in love with yourself all the time, no matter what?
When we're in the first throws of love, an uplifting and liberating shift happens that resembles the freedom we're after. Romantic bliss can make you almost illogically accepting of every joy, pain, fear, feeling, thought, person, and every moment of the day. You can't help but see the positive possibilities in every situation and feel a heightened sense of courage and confidence.
The last time I was in love I remember saying to myself, "Dear God, Please let me feel this way when I'm single. If only I could feel this way all the time!". When the chemistry of love strikes, I think we're more in love with who we are when we're with them, than the other person.
Besides, when you first meet someone it really isn't about them, right? Most of the experience in the beginning is fantasy and projection, yet it's so cathartic and powerful. I have a great card I made and on the front of it, it says, "You are the love of my life", and then when you open it up it says, "Because I don't know you yet and I can still make it all up."
So if we really do make it up when we get triggered by another, then we really don't need anyone else to feel this way, right? lol.
The point is, that when love happens a brilliant self-view occurs. Our unconscious is conditioned to give love powerful meaning. It means things like; I'm loved, accepted, attractive, worthy, valuable etc. The truths that release us from our self-doubt and we need to remember these all the time. When our complaining programs quiet because of our new romance we see them so easily.
A romantic idealism kicks in that lubricates your whole experience. We feel rewarded and aligned with life. Things are easier, more tolerable, and you find yourself sliding past the your complaints as you feel more compassionate and allowing. There is also a certain cherishing quality to falling in love that lets us extend ourselves more generously. We take the extra step, give more attention and show up more fully.
All of this, and the happiness that goes with it are what we are striving to experience on a daily basis. It's a perfect metaphor. So let's imagine it and use it as a practice.
Yesterday I had an opportunity to spontaneously try this on. There is an example below, but here are the steps:
1) Approach the situation as if you feel like everything is right with the world. What would you do if you were optimistic, powerful, compassionate and generous?
2) Look at the situation and people involved as if you cherish them and love them immensely. What are your choices now? How can you support them?
3) Let your self-doubts go. Imagine yourself with the confidence and trust you need to take the step in front of you.
4) Imagine you will still be loved by yourself and others no matter what happens next.
Yesterday my chance to try this out for myself. There is a side of my house that has needed raking for a while, and I avoid it because it means I have to trim a few small Bougainvillea Vines. If you don't know these plants, these vines are beautiful but tragic. They have these gorgeous, vibrant, pink paper-like leaves as flowers and the branches have the most deadly 1/2" to 1" thorns you've ever seen. They look like rose thorns on steroids.
I was already hot and tired, but I found myself jump right in and start raking. It was going quite well until the first thorn attacked. Right through my glove and into the tip of my thumb. Ouch! Pain!
I took a breath, and actually got through the moment without much story about how this shouldn't have happened. That's my usual approach, but then I also remembered this practice. Opportunities open up when you stop your stories. I was thrilled to have this chance to try "feeling in love" so spontaneously.
So here I was; in pretty bad pain, HOT, exhausted, intensely dirty and sweaty, when I asked myself, "What If I were in love with this moment?"
My first reaction to myself was literally, "shut the #!&!$% up", and then I just breathed. When the thought looped back around the second time I caught it with more composure. What happened was profound and interesting;
I found myself first of all realizing that I wasn't present. I was just trying to get through a messy, uncomfortable task. If I were in love with it, I would want to relish each moment. I didn't take it "that" far, but I did settle in. I also realized I probably wouldn't have been attacked by the thorn, if I had been more present and more mindfully approaching it.
I was getting the debris raked up but I wasn't really caring for it the way I would. I remember spending 20 minutes just making sure a romantic phone message was perfect. Now I could see it differently, and I not only removed the debris but made sure the rake lines left in the gravel were stylish.
And now that I was more relaxed and into this, I thought I should call my neighbor and tell her that I made more work for her gardeners with my leaves. I wanted to warn her because I thought she never would see it, but as it turns out she looks at this side yard through a window constantly and I had no idea. I didn't realize that the mountains are behind me when she looks in my direction, and it meant she was going to get a lot of joy out of my effort.
I felt more compassionate toward the plants and was hating them less for causing me pain. I was making peace with the Bougainvillea and admiring the beautiful flowers and even the thorns. And even though I was hurting, it was all feeling really good until...
I backed up onto one of those perfect creations of God, and it went right up through my shoe and into my #$@%^& foot! Or is it the #$@&%^ creation of God, went into my foot!
At this point, being in love with this amount of pain seemed ludicrous and I just walked away. Comically similar to a relationship I remember.
So here is sit, immobilized by my situation as my extremely painful foot is trying to mock my attempts at love. But I keep trying to let my complaints go and I'm feeling pretty peaceful.
At the same time, even though we can take difficult situations and turn them into teachers, sometimes these people or things aren't who or what we want to repeat. HIV has been a wild ride and an impressive teacher, but I would have chosen something a little threatening and more fun. I am feeling the same way about the Bougainvillea.
So I tried to break the news gently. I'm not sure she took it very well, but I tried to explain it's not about either of us personally; It's about how we connect that isn't working for me. lol. I walked away richer for the experience, but I don't plan to ever cut another bougainvillea again if I can help it!
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
What if you could face the world as if you were "in love"? What if you treated the moment in front of you as if it were something you cherished? What if you were in love with yourself all the time, no matter what?
When we're in the first throws of love, an uplifting and liberating shift happens that resembles the freedom we're after. Romantic bliss can make you almost illogically accepting of every joy, pain, fear, feeling, thought, person, and every moment of the day. You can't help but see the positive possibilities in every situation and feel a heightened sense of courage and confidence.
The last time I was in love I remember saying to myself, "Dear God, Please let me feel this way when I'm single. If only I could feel this way all the time!". When the chemistry of love strikes, I think we're more in love with who we are when we're with them, than the other person.
Besides, when you first meet someone it really isn't about them, right? Most of the experience in the beginning is fantasy and projection, yet it's so cathartic and powerful. I have a great card I made and on the front of it, it says, "You are the love of my life", and then when you open it up it says, "Because I don't know you yet and I can still make it all up."
So if we really do make it up when we get triggered by another, then we really don't need anyone else to feel this way, right? lol.
The point is, that when love happens a brilliant self-view occurs. Our unconscious is conditioned to give love powerful meaning. It means things like; I'm loved, accepted, attractive, worthy, valuable etc. The truths that release us from our self-doubt and we need to remember these all the time. When our complaining programs quiet because of our new romance we see them so easily.
A romantic idealism kicks in that lubricates your whole experience. We feel rewarded and aligned with life. Things are easier, more tolerable, and you find yourself sliding past the your complaints as you feel more compassionate and allowing. There is also a certain cherishing quality to falling in love that lets us extend ourselves more generously. We take the extra step, give more attention and show up more fully.
All of this, and the happiness that goes with it are what we are striving to experience on a daily basis. It's a perfect metaphor. So let's imagine it and use it as a practice.
Yesterday I had an opportunity to spontaneously try this on. There is an example below, but here are the steps:
1) Approach the situation as if you feel like everything is right with the world. What would you do if you were optimistic, powerful, compassionate and generous?
2) Look at the situation and people involved as if you cherish them and love them immensely. What are your choices now? How can you support them?
3) Let your self-doubts go. Imagine yourself with the confidence and trust you need to take the step in front of you.
4) Imagine you will still be loved by yourself and others no matter what happens next.
Yesterday my chance to try this out for myself. There is a side of my house that has needed raking for a while, and I avoid it because it means I have to trim a few small Bougainvillea Vines. If you don't know these plants, these vines are beautiful but tragic. They have these gorgeous, vibrant, pink paper-like leaves as flowers and the branches have the most deadly 1/2" to 1" thorns you've ever seen. They look like rose thorns on steroids.
I was already hot and tired, but I found myself jump right in and start raking. It was going quite well until the first thorn attacked. Right through my glove and into the tip of my thumb. Ouch! Pain!
I took a breath, and actually got through the moment without much story about how this shouldn't have happened. That's my usual approach, but then I also remembered this practice. Opportunities open up when you stop your stories. I was thrilled to have this chance to try "feeling in love" so spontaneously.
So here I was; in pretty bad pain, HOT, exhausted, intensely dirty and sweaty, when I asked myself, "What If I were in love with this moment?"
My first reaction to myself was literally, "shut the #!&!$% up", and then I just breathed. When the thought looped back around the second time I caught it with more composure. What happened was profound and interesting;
I found myself first of all realizing that I wasn't present. I was just trying to get through a messy, uncomfortable task. If I were in love with it, I would want to relish each moment. I didn't take it "that" far, but I did settle in. I also realized I probably wouldn't have been attacked by the thorn, if I had been more present and more mindfully approaching it.
I was getting the debris raked up but I wasn't really caring for it the way I would. I remember spending 20 minutes just making sure a romantic phone message was perfect. Now I could see it differently, and I not only removed the debris but made sure the rake lines left in the gravel were stylish.
And now that I was more relaxed and into this, I thought I should call my neighbor and tell her that I made more work for her gardeners with my leaves. I wanted to warn her because I thought she never would see it, but as it turns out she looks at this side yard through a window constantly and I had no idea. I didn't realize that the mountains are behind me when she looks in my direction, and it meant she was going to get a lot of joy out of my effort.
I felt more compassionate toward the plants and was hating them less for causing me pain. I was making peace with the Bougainvillea and admiring the beautiful flowers and even the thorns. And even though I was hurting, it was all feeling really good until...
I backed up onto one of those perfect creations of God, and it went right up through my shoe and into my #$@%^& foot! Or is it the #$@&%^ creation of God, went into my foot!
At this point, being in love with this amount of pain seemed ludicrous and I just walked away. Comically similar to a relationship I remember.
So here is sit, immobilized by my situation as my extremely painful foot is trying to mock my attempts at love. But I keep trying to let my complaints go and I'm feeling pretty peaceful.
At the same time, even though we can take difficult situations and turn them into teachers, sometimes these people or things aren't who or what we want to repeat. HIV has been a wild ride and an impressive teacher, but I would have chosen something a little threatening and more fun. I am feeling the same way about the Bougainvillea.
So I tried to break the news gently. I'm not sure she took it very well, but I tried to explain it's not about either of us personally; It's about how we connect that isn't working for me. lol. I walked away richer for the experience, but I don't plan to ever cut another bougainvillea again if I can help it!
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 58Th. Points to Ponder.
Greetings,
More points to ponder:
A negative possibility would only create one moment of fear if the complaining mind didn't repeat the idea over and over again.
It's more important for me to know who I'm not, rather than who I am. I know I'm not my complaining mind. Thank God I'm not that neurotic.
You don't have to like what’s happening, but something good does comes from everything in some corner of the universe.
It's delusional to just make something up and then believe it. We're doing this every time we think our opinions reflect the truth.
If you don’t know what happens next you can't really know that this moment shouldn't be happening.
If you save a complaint for later it might never exist.
If you don't think you can meditate you might not know the practice. Who can't notice a thought, allow it, release it and then look again?
We need to allow each others' shadows without taking them so personally, and stop condemning everyone else's like we don't have one.
If you're not really listening to someone you end up in relationship with your imagination.
I wish you could feel what meditation practice can do. What if you could stop thinking of something when you wanted to? You might love it.
Positive thoughts are fun but they're only needed when you're counteracting the compulsive negative ones. It's actually nicer to just "be".
At some point your response to your inner critic will be an automatic, skillful and wise reply. It will be so natural you can just relax.
What if you could approach life as if you were "In love" with it? When we're in love, anything seems possible and we cherish who were with.
It's time to consciously re-train ourselves. We have to inspire a compassionate imagination and re-convince ourselves we all deserve it.
When you really see that we all have a negative part of us that we need to manage but don't need to be ashamed of, we can drop our judgment.
Peace to you.
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
More points to ponder:
A negative possibility would only create one moment of fear if the complaining mind didn't repeat the idea over and over again.
It's more important for me to know who I'm not, rather than who I am. I know I'm not my complaining mind. Thank God I'm not that neurotic.
You don't have to like what’s happening, but something good does comes from everything in some corner of the universe.
It's delusional to just make something up and then believe it. We're doing this every time we think our opinions reflect the truth.
If you don’t know what happens next you can't really know that this moment shouldn't be happening.
If you save a complaint for later it might never exist.
If you don't think you can meditate you might not know the practice. Who can't notice a thought, allow it, release it and then look again?
We need to allow each others' shadows without taking them so personally, and stop condemning everyone else's like we don't have one.
If you're not really listening to someone you end up in relationship with your imagination.
I wish you could feel what meditation practice can do. What if you could stop thinking of something when you wanted to? You might love it.
Positive thoughts are fun but they're only needed when you're counteracting the compulsive negative ones. It's actually nicer to just "be".
At some point your response to your inner critic will be an automatic, skillful and wise reply. It will be so natural you can just relax.
What if you could approach life as if you were "In love" with it? When we're in love, anything seems possible and we cherish who were with.
It's time to consciously re-train ourselves. We have to inspire a compassionate imagination and re-convince ourselves we all deserve it.
When you really see that we all have a negative part of us that we need to manage but don't need to be ashamed of, we can drop our judgment.
Peace to you.
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 57Th. More Tweachings.
Greetings,
Quotes for the week:
Positive thoughts are fun but they're only needed when you're counteracting the compulsive negative ones. It's actually nicer to just "be".
What if you could approach life as if you were "In love" with it? When we're in love, anything seems possible and we cherish who we're with.
It's time to consciously re-train ourselves. We have to inspire a compassionate imagination and re-convince ourselves we all deserve it.
I wish you could feel what meditation practice can do. What if you could stop thinking of something when you wanted to? You might love it.
When you really see that we all have a negative part of us that we need to manage but don't need to be ashamed of, we can drop our judgment.
Don't let the complaining mind put everything together under the heading of "how the day didn't go your way". Many things did if you look.
Remaining peaceful always makes sense, so we could just start choosing it more often instead of having to prove it to ourselves all the time.
At some point your response to your inner critic will be an automatic, skillful and wise reply. It will be so natural you can just relax.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Quotes for the week:
Positive thoughts are fun but they're only needed when you're counteracting the compulsive negative ones. It's actually nicer to just "be".
What if you could approach life as if you were "In love" with it? When we're in love, anything seems possible and we cherish who we're with.
It's time to consciously re-train ourselves. We have to inspire a compassionate imagination and re-convince ourselves we all deserve it.
I wish you could feel what meditation practice can do. What if you could stop thinking of something when you wanted to? You might love it.
When you really see that we all have a negative part of us that we need to manage but don't need to be ashamed of, we can drop our judgment.
Don't let the complaining mind put everything together under the heading of "how the day didn't go your way". Many things did if you look.
Remaining peaceful always makes sense, so we could just start choosing it more often instead of having to prove it to ourselves all the time.
At some point your response to your inner critic will be an automatic, skillful and wise reply. It will be so natural you can just relax.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
The 56TH. How we are victims to our aggression.
Greetings,
This kind of synchronicity is powerful...
I have a story to share from the last couple days. The last inspirations have been about trust, compassion, and tolerance for others mistakes. What happened this week was a fascinating teaching for me around compassion.
I was driving down Palm Canyon when I saw a young woman in blue Chevy Vega, stop abruptly to avoid hitting a bicycler. The rider was moving pretty quickly, and he suddenly dropped off the curb to cross the street in front of her as she was turning. She almost hit him but did stop just in time.
I could tell by the jerkiness of his movements that the bicycler's condemning and complaining mind was about to unleash. Within seconds he was battering her with racial slander and vicious obscenities that literally paralyzed her. She just sat there until he was finished, and when he rode away she pulled over and just covered her face with her hands.
My heart just broke. The woman was terrified and obviously had just made a mistake. My first reaction was to resent this man for his cruelty, and I interestingly saw myself siding with the driver, because she was the one being abused. The man was just being a bully, or a "complain in the ass" as I comically refer to them. I have a real personal trigger around aggression.
Then about two minutes later in a different place as I'm stopped at a light, the driver behind me almost slams into me from behind. You can probably guess what happened. Here comes "my own" rage. As I saw it explode within me I also simultaneously saw how afraid and threatened I was, and at that moment I woke up. I flashed to the man on the bike and I completely related to his fear. At that moment I saw his vulnerability, and I laughed as my heart opened up for him in a way it hadn't before. They were "both" victims.
We are "all" vulnerable in some way. This we can trust. When your judging mind kicks in you can break it's momentum with this truth, and you can use these moments as a trigger to send wishes for peace and relief instead.
Imagine everyone as the walking wounded or even as the driving wounded. When that nut cuts you off on the freeway, try to imagine what he must be going through to make him so crazy. It truly "is" possible he just found out his child has cancer or something else tragic just happened.
Compassion doesn't arise instantly because our negative programs are in the way. We have to inspire a compassionate imagination and re-convince ourselves we all deserve it.
The ultimate trust is to remember people need your help. Someone is suffering if they're causing you or others pain. Make it a practice to recognize when you're being critical of someone, and use that as a trigger to send them wishes for healing and peace. Even if it isn't obvious how someone is suffering, you can trust that they've been shut down by some kind of trauma.
And aside from benefiting others with your tolerance and compassionate efforts, every time you can see your judgment as it is happening and extend a wish for healing instead, you are healing your own mind and cultivating your own happiness as well.
Peace to you,
Bryan
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This kind of synchronicity is powerful...
I have a story to share from the last couple days. The last inspirations have been about trust, compassion, and tolerance for others mistakes. What happened this week was a fascinating teaching for me around compassion.
I was driving down Palm Canyon when I saw a young woman in blue Chevy Vega, stop abruptly to avoid hitting a bicycler. The rider was moving pretty quickly, and he suddenly dropped off the curb to cross the street in front of her as she was turning. She almost hit him but did stop just in time.
I could tell by the jerkiness of his movements that the bicycler's condemning and complaining mind was about to unleash. Within seconds he was battering her with racial slander and vicious obscenities that literally paralyzed her. She just sat there until he was finished, and when he rode away she pulled over and just covered her face with her hands.
My heart just broke. The woman was terrified and obviously had just made a mistake. My first reaction was to resent this man for his cruelty, and I interestingly saw myself siding with the driver, because she was the one being abused. The man was just being a bully, or a "complain in the ass" as I comically refer to them. I have a real personal trigger around aggression.
Then about two minutes later in a different place as I'm stopped at a light, the driver behind me almost slams into me from behind. You can probably guess what happened. Here comes "my own" rage. As I saw it explode within me I also simultaneously saw how afraid and threatened I was, and at that moment I woke up. I flashed to the man on the bike and I completely related to his fear. At that moment I saw his vulnerability, and I laughed as my heart opened up for him in a way it hadn't before. They were "both" victims.
We are "all" vulnerable in some way. This we can trust. When your judging mind kicks in you can break it's momentum with this truth, and you can use these moments as a trigger to send wishes for peace and relief instead.
Imagine everyone as the walking wounded or even as the driving wounded. When that nut cuts you off on the freeway, try to imagine what he must be going through to make him so crazy. It truly "is" possible he just found out his child has cancer or something else tragic just happened.
Compassion doesn't arise instantly because our negative programs are in the way. We have to inspire a compassionate imagination and re-convince ourselves we all deserve it.
The ultimate trust is to remember people need your help. Someone is suffering if they're causing you or others pain. Make it a practice to recognize when you're being critical of someone, and use that as a trigger to send them wishes for healing and peace. Even if it isn't obvious how someone is suffering, you can trust that they've been shut down by some kind of trauma.
And aside from benefiting others with your tolerance and compassionate efforts, every time you can see your judgment as it is happening and extend a wish for healing instead, you are healing your own mind and cultivating your own happiness as well.
Peace to you,
Bryan
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Bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 55TH. Trust means you don't believe your pain when you're hurt.
Greetings,
To continue on trust, I apologize for the sleepy-eyed typo in the last inspiration. It was a reference to finding yourself in an argument with a loved one and it was supposed to read:
"You're both just trying to get each other back, and neither of you meant to start it."
This is the heart of what's going on when two people are swept away in defense and attack. We get convinced unconsciously by our feelings that we've been wounded, and they're so strong we lose sight of our trust in the other person. It's almost uncanny how in those moments we believe this defensiveness over the confidence and trust we have for people.
Our critical programs get triggered, and before you know it you've got some crazy stories going on about how they never liked you to begin with, or the whole relationship has been a sham because you were just being used. If you're aware of this while it's happening it's fascinating to watch, and you can see these thoughts as programs instead of just believing them.
Trust means you give someone the benefit of the doubt. You challenge your wounded feelings and then communicate. It "makes sense" to assume your negative assumptions are wrong and find out the truth. Most conflicts just disappear this way and you often become closer as well.
And of course every once in a while people can't be trusted. They get possessed by their shadow and act out but it is the exception to the rule.
It's important not to lose sight of the amazing amount of safety we have. Very difficult things happen once in a while to everyone, but it's really only very few moments of our lives.
A little fear can make a lot of sense, but our level of caution has to be in line with how often something happens, and not an exaggerated view. It's crazy how one cruel person can get up our defenses and we end up treating the whole world as if it's a mean place. We have to watch our perspectives and keep them balanced. Almost everything happening in the news will never happen to you. If you stay sensible about your fearful notions your overall viewpoint will change to a more peaceful one.
The bottom line is that whatever happens, you can trust you'll be able to handle it "then". We don't need to ruin today's peace by premeditating every negative possibility. There is only one thing you're not going to be able to handle, and it's extremely unlikely it is going to happen to you today.
Remaining Peaceful and trusting life always makes sense, so we should just start choosing it more often instead of having to prove it to ourselves all of the time.
Peace to you,
Bryan
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Tuesday, June 14, 2011
The 54TH. Neither of you meant to start it.
Greetings,
This insight arose during a couple's session, and it's a poignant and profound truth that can change everything. It really gets to the core of most relationship issues.
If you ever find yourself in the middle of an argument with your loved one, just remember;
"You're both just trying to get each other back, and neither of you meant to start it."
They love you. You love them. Challenge yourself. Catch yourself make the mistake of distrusting the person you love. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Forgive them instantly. Just start asking questions and figure out why things were said and done. It's so rarely the case that they wanted to hurt you. They deserve your trust "first".
What was a battle zone has now become a puzzle and no one is being blamed any longer. You're shadow just sighs as it gives you back the "conscious control" of your life.
Peace to you,
Bryan
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
This insight arose during a couple's session, and it's a poignant and profound truth that can change everything. It really gets to the core of most relationship issues.
If you ever find yourself in the middle of an argument with your loved one, just remember;
"You're both just trying to get each other back, and neither of you meant to start it."
They love you. You love them. Challenge yourself. Catch yourself make the mistake of distrusting the person you love. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Forgive them instantly. Just start asking questions and figure out why things were said and done. It's so rarely the case that they wanted to hurt you. They deserve your trust "first".
What was a battle zone has now become a puzzle and no one is being blamed any longer. You're shadow just sighs as it gives you back the "conscious control" of your life.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
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click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/knowcomplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Saturday, June 11, 2011
The 52nd. Quotes to Ponder.
Greetings,
Points to ponder:
We can be happy, sad, lonely, content, feel safe and afraid at the same time. We can only think of one feeling at a time but we can feel them all at once.
Pretty much everything we think about the future is an assumption. We can't predict it but we habitually try anyway. So if you're going to make up a story about it, at least make up one that feels good. You could also just live presently and peacefully in the unknown, but don't expect to much of yourself at first. That's next!
Sometimes I just feel like screaming at people," Smile !!! ". I think it's hysterical my shadow wants to punish people for not being kind.
If people are caught in judgment and attack you, you can trust they are much more critical of themselves and they must be pretty miserable. This isn't something we want to be happy about. It just helps take the sting away when you realize that they're suffering and need help.
It's unfortunate but relieving at the same time, that almost everyone has a part of themselves that is as afraid of you as you are of them.
It's like there's a committee in my head, and when something happens to me, each member has their own opinion about how I should be feeling.
The big truth is that everyone makes mistakes but very few of us mean to hurt others.
If you could let go of the complaints you have about yourself, you might be so happy you won't feel much like complaining about anyone else.
It can be so difficult to let our complaints about other people go, but it could ultimately mean you'll receive more compassion from others as a result of it.
Life is so much simpler if we don't take things so personally. People get overwhelmed and just do things that don't need to mean so much.
When you believe your hurt feelings because of what a loved one has said, you're distrusting their love for you. Do they really deserve it?
Peace to you,
Bryan
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Bryanzerr copyright 2011
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
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Bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 51st. Awareness, mindfulness and being rewarded for courage.
Greetings,
It seems there might be a natural order to things where we are rewarded for the steps of courage we take. Not because we've gotten someone's approval, but because when we make a more conscious or loving choice it brings with it a whole new paradigm with all new possibilities.
The theory is that our situations will not only look different, but that they will actually play out differently because you are now consciously resonating with a more beneficial state of consciousness. It's like going through a consciousness wormhole and moving to a more evolved parallel reality because of your intention.
When we change our level of spiritual integrity and push ourselves past our old, negative, self-centered programs we get an energetic lift that seems to bring a little more divine energy and grace into our lives.
When you make the choice to stop complaining, you deny the shadow and are making a worthy change. You're gonna help the world be a kinder and more positive place, but the transformation that you go through to be able to free yourself from the control of the critical mind and stop complaining is huge! The change will be "universal" for you instead of just making you a less complaining person to talk to. When you make a more loving attempt at life it seems to get friendlier and the positive impact you have on the world will be more significant than you can imagine.
This is just a story but it's also my experience. The more we let go of trying to control life and show up with a commitment to bring our heart to every moment, the more magical and wonderful everything gets. As Eckhart Tolle says, "Life just seems to get friendlier when you shift into the present and stop complaining". I added the "complaining" part but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't complain about it. LOL
Awareness and mindfulness. Let's continue to practice waking up and create our peace. Stay aware of your focus and keep bringing it back to acceptance and trust. Nurture and protect your intention to by staying conscious in your observer. Take the time to empower your self-awareness.
Be vigilant and keep it present. Sustain a positive attitude and when you can, don't allow yourself to linger in life's dramas. So much of what the complaining mind is focused isn't in your best interest. To take yourself into a painful, critical space about something far away and out of your control is potentially keeping you from changing. We don't want to be ignorant or in denial, but we also don't want to lose our conscious priorities. We need to put our attention where it is the going to be most effective which is into our own consciousness.
Bring the focus back to yourself and keep your attention on finding peace and expressing love. You can really help our world, but you also might just have a much better time while your here.
Wishes for peace to you,
Bryan
It seems there might be a natural order to things where we are rewarded for the steps of courage we take. Not because we've gotten someone's approval, but because when we make a more conscious or loving choice it brings with it a whole new paradigm with all new possibilities.
The theory is that our situations will not only look different, but that they will actually play out differently because you are now consciously resonating with a more beneficial state of consciousness. It's like going through a consciousness wormhole and moving to a more evolved parallel reality because of your intention.
When we change our level of spiritual integrity and push ourselves past our old, negative, self-centered programs we get an energetic lift that seems to bring a little more divine energy and grace into our lives.
When you make the choice to stop complaining, you deny the shadow and are making a worthy change. You're gonna help the world be a kinder and more positive place, but the transformation that you go through to be able to free yourself from the control of the critical mind and stop complaining is huge! The change will be "universal" for you instead of just making you a less complaining person to talk to. When you make a more loving attempt at life it seems to get friendlier and the positive impact you have on the world will be more significant than you can imagine.
This is just a story but it's also my experience. The more we let go of trying to control life and show up with a commitment to bring our heart to every moment, the more magical and wonderful everything gets. As Eckhart Tolle says, "Life just seems to get friendlier when you shift into the present and stop complaining". I added the "complaining" part but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't complain about it. LOL
Awareness and mindfulness. Let's continue to practice waking up and create our peace. Stay aware of your focus and keep bringing it back to acceptance and trust. Nurture and protect your intention to by staying conscious in your observer. Take the time to empower your self-awareness.
Be vigilant and keep it present. Sustain a positive attitude and when you can, don't allow yourself to linger in life's dramas. So much of what the complaining mind is focused isn't in your best interest. To take yourself into a painful, critical space about something far away and out of your control is potentially keeping you from changing. We don't want to be ignorant or in denial, but we also don't want to lose our conscious priorities. We need to put our attention where it is the going to be most effective which is into our own consciousness.
Bring the focus back to yourself and keep your attention on finding peace and expressing love. You can really help our world, but you also might just have a much better time while your here.
Wishes for peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
The 50th. Trust and giving the benefit of the doubt.
...
Greetings,
For those of you just joining, there are now 50 inspirations available for your reading pleasure, and I'd like to mention how much I appreciate the attention and encouragement I've received up to now. The response has been so moving and it's very meaningful for me to be connected to such a sincere and amazing group of people.
Today I'm inspired to share what has empowered me to let go of my self-created suffering more than anything. It would thrill me if it inspired you as deeply as it did myself.
The premise is that when you feel hurt, unloved or offended by someone you love... when you "believe" your hurt feelings, it denies the trust you supposedly have for these people you are close to. It's a common notion that the people you are close to are the people you can trust.
What we don't realize is that our anger or hurt is based on an unconscious assumption that someone wants to cause you pain. This hidden idea or interpretation isn't true most of the time and this judgment is an offense to their integrity.
It's like we get temporary amnesia. The people we know and trust deserve the benefit of the doubt. Our first reaction logically should be that they just made a senseless mistake and not that they tried to hurt us and deserve to be punished. We also to need trust they will likely be willing to try to work things out. Both these truths would keep us peaceful and in our hearts instead of getting into our defenses.
From my experience it is almost always true that our pains and hurt feelings are because we have misunderstood someone's intentions. The tragedy is that we've usually already hurt or insulted these people with our feelings or anger before we have taken the time to figure out they didn't deserve it.
"The big truth is that everyone makes mistakes and very few of us mean to hurt others."
A typical scenario is that your friend or partner forgets your birthday, is late, or forgets something concerning you. If this means to you that they don't care about you or love you enough to remember, you're going to feel hurt. If it means they just got busy or forgetful, you might still be disappointed or annoyed but you won't be hurt. This can save you from enormous amounts of conflict in your relationships. Doubt your suspicions, not the person you love.
The practice is to ALWAYS doubt your upset, and question the negative meaning you give to whatever was just said or what happened. If you do you will be pleasantly surprised to confirm that most people really do care about you and want you to be happy. You will also have once again diffused the grief and damage that can be caused by the negative assumptions of our complaining, critical and condemning mind.
Wishing you a peaceful and trusting day,
Bryan
Greetings,
For those of you just joining, there are now 50 inspirations available for your reading pleasure, and I'd like to mention how much I appreciate the attention and encouragement I've received up to now. The response has been so moving and it's very meaningful for me to be connected to such a sincere and amazing group of people.
Today I'm inspired to share what has empowered me to let go of my self-created suffering more than anything. It would thrill me if it inspired you as deeply as it did myself.
The premise is that when you feel hurt, unloved or offended by someone you love... when you "believe" your hurt feelings, it denies the trust you supposedly have for these people you are close to. It's a common notion that the people you are close to are the people you can trust.
What we don't realize is that our anger or hurt is based on an unconscious assumption that someone wants to cause you pain. This hidden idea or interpretation isn't true most of the time and this judgment is an offense to their integrity.
It's like we get temporary amnesia. The people we know and trust deserve the benefit of the doubt. Our first reaction logically should be that they just made a senseless mistake and not that they tried to hurt us and deserve to be punished. We also to need trust they will likely be willing to try to work things out. Both these truths would keep us peaceful and in our hearts instead of getting into our defenses.
From my experience it is almost always true that our pains and hurt feelings are because we have misunderstood someone's intentions. The tragedy is that we've usually already hurt or insulted these people with our feelings or anger before we have taken the time to figure out they didn't deserve it.
"The big truth is that everyone makes mistakes and very few of us mean to hurt others."
A typical scenario is that your friend or partner forgets your birthday, is late, or forgets something concerning you. If this means to you that they don't care about you or love you enough to remember, you're going to feel hurt. If it means they just got busy or forgetful, you might still be disappointed or annoyed but you won't be hurt. This can save you from enormous amounts of conflict in your relationships. Doubt your suspicions, not the person you love.
The practice is to ALWAYS doubt your upset, and question the negative meaning you give to whatever was just said or what happened. If you do you will be pleasantly surprised to confirm that most people really do care about you and want you to be happy. You will also have once again diffused the grief and damage that can be caused by the negative assumptions of our complaining, critical and condemning mind.
Wishing you a peaceful and trusting day,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Monday, June 6, 2011
The 49th. More tweachings.
Greetings,
Today's inspiration is a small collection of insights from the week I wanted to share...
If we are complaining about the complainers we're missing the point. Anytime we give into a feeling that needs to make something bad, we've lost. We can dislike it without punishing it. It's an energetic difference.
We can just see them as not good enough. Even something intolerable can just be changed or walked away from, without all the drama of the complaining critical and condemning mind.
Try asking the person you are speaking with a question about themselves. It sounds absurd to make this a point, but one of the first thing that goes away when we get caught by our complaining mind seems to be our interest in others.
Give everyone including your self a break today. Life's hard. We're all really trying our best no matter what the complaining mind has to say.
I'm so aware of the inner critic from this work. Almost everyone is struggling with this craziness. When will we finally stop believing it?
We don't "say yes" to our complaining stories by believing them, we accept the story as meaningless and say yes to what really is. It's much friendlier.
Just "say yes" to end your resistance. Stop the struggle. If it's happening you might as well embrace it. This doesn't diminish your power, it just helps you see and admit what your next step is without making it much of a problem.
When we complain, we "feel, resist and then find a way to make it wrong". When we share our troubles in a conscious way, we "feel, allow, and then describe our situation with empathy, compassion and best wishes for everyone.
It seems crazy, but how a feeling "feels" is actually beside the point. What's important is whether or not it makes sense or not.
Sometimes you can't get through to people. Most issues are just one big misunderstanding, and your patience is a gift to the relationship.
The value of anger is the part that warns you that there is something you want to question, change or stop or walk away from. The part that wants to punish and attack back needs to be tempered, but the part that wants to protect you from being hurt again makes sense.
Wishing you a weekend filled with endless acknowledgment of all the things you have to be grateful about. Happiness is an attitude as well as a feeling.
Peace to you,
Bryan
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Bryanzerr copyright 2011
Today's inspiration is a small collection of insights from the week I wanted to share...
If we are complaining about the complainers we're missing the point. Anytime we give into a feeling that needs to make something bad, we've lost. We can dislike it without punishing it. It's an energetic difference.
We can just see them as not good enough. Even something intolerable can just be changed or walked away from, without all the drama of the complaining critical and condemning mind.
Try asking the person you are speaking with a question about themselves. It sounds absurd to make this a point, but one of the first thing that goes away when we get caught by our complaining mind seems to be our interest in others.
Give everyone including your self a break today. Life's hard. We're all really trying our best no matter what the complaining mind has to say.
I'm so aware of the inner critic from this work. Almost everyone is struggling with this craziness. When will we finally stop believing it?
We don't "say yes" to our complaining stories by believing them, we accept the story as meaningless and say yes to what really is. It's much friendlier.
Just "say yes" to end your resistance. Stop the struggle. If it's happening you might as well embrace it. This doesn't diminish your power, it just helps you see and admit what your next step is without making it much of a problem.
When we complain, we "feel, resist and then find a way to make it wrong". When we share our troubles in a conscious way, we "feel, allow, and then describe our situation with empathy, compassion and best wishes for everyone.
It seems crazy, but how a feeling "feels" is actually beside the point. What's important is whether or not it makes sense or not.
Sometimes you can't get through to people. Most issues are just one big misunderstanding, and your patience is a gift to the relationship.
The value of anger is the part that warns you that there is something you want to question, change or stop or walk away from. The part that wants to punish and attack back needs to be tempered, but the part that wants to protect you from being hurt again makes sense.
Wishing you a weekend filled with endless acknowledgment of all the things you have to be grateful about. Happiness is an attitude as well as a feeling.
Peace to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
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Bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 48th. How to create happiness.
Greetings,
As we shift from being controlled by our complaining critical programs, we get to create more of what "feels good" in our life, but we have to know specifically what we want. What are the "good feelings" we'd like to have and where do they come from?
My experience shows me that people feel good when they're experiencing, expressing or demonstrating love. Not because it makes God happy like many of us were taught, but because the acts of wisdom and love themselves intelligently cultivate a healthy mind, heart and connections with others. So when we demonstrate or receive love, compassion, or support, what do we end up feeling?
It's important for us to know specifically so we can include "the idea" of these feelings in our consciousness. Happiness is very vague so to break it down for myself; happiness is a loving and wise frame of mind that includes many different loving and healthy points of view about self and others. In my opinion there are many good feelings that can inspire happiness, but interestingly we aren't very good at identifying what they are.
If I were to ask you what are the good feelings you like, the common response I get is happiness, joy and orgasm. After that, most people run out of things to say.
If I ask you to describe unhappiness, or feelings you don't like, it would probably be easier. You'd say fear, worry, loneliness, boredom, sadness, pain, anger, impatience, frustration, disappointment, etc...They would be right there in the front of your consciousness because we focus on them and talk about them all the time. We typically don't speak about good feelings in detail to ourselves or to each other, and to change we have to "think" about them as well as include them in our conversations.
I have a very dear friend Shey who spent a week with me recently. She would come out sleepy eyed in the morning and her spirit just pours out with such a beautiful "good morning". It's worth its weight in gold to me. I never get over it and it leaves me smiling many times a day. She also has this very powerful conscious and unconscious habit of stopping and framing the moment, which is a powerful practice.
For instance; She will be sitting there with her cup of coffee, looking out at the flowers and all cuddled up on the couch in a blanket, when all of a sudden she will say, "How nice it is to be sitting here, in such a beautiful place with my dear friend Bryan who I love so much, drinking this warm and amazing cup of coffee." You can see why I'm sad when she leaves.
This caught me by surprise because I had never heard anyone announce out loud a story reflecting the present moment as if it were an entry in a journal or a tweet and she does it in a very playful and self-entertaining way. It made me giggle. I could see it brought her a lot of pleasure and it also grounded in her wisdom to ward off her inner critic, and her story was like a shield of appreciation to keep the possible complaints away.
It was deeply inspiring, effective and fun. It was like being in a musical when all of a sudden one of the characters decides to break out in song, except she was just breaking out into gratitude and appreciation. It's a perfect example of how we need stop and consciously re-frame our world to create good feelings.
We are programmed to frame things in a "news report" kind" of focus. We ask ourselves, "What's wrong, and how it could possibly get worse? This needs to be changed and these proclamations of "the joy of the moment" are a beautiful and intentional act of happiness to make that happen. We need to seek our contentment, inspire it and talk it into existence.
Words of affection, acknowledgment, praise, recognition, complements, acceptance, acknowledgment, humor, support, encouragement, optimism, trust, and are all happiness creators when either given or received.
You will feel; appreciated, respected, loved, safe, worthy, trusted, adequate, meaningful, content, admired, valued, peaceful, connected, grateful, supported, and cared for. And again it's so simple: Giving and receiving love is the answer.
It's been scientifically proven that these positive words and their feelings not only feel good, but are beneficial to the health and evolution of everyone. http://dld.bz/Iam. (The movie)
This is the wisdom we need to remember and practice assertively to make a difference. Please infuse this insight into every point of view you have about yourself until you successfully see yourself as a good enough mother, family member, employee, creator, partner, lover. You need to honor your strengths and forgive your shortcomings, and every self-reference point, as well as every perspective of other people has to be turned into a loving view. It just takes practice, encouragement and guidance and it's here.
As complaints arise they are now your beautiful guides that show you all your critical perspectives that you get to heal. Be excited about them! They can lead you to freedom.
Take a break to day to see yourself with love in whatever roles you play. Frame yourself with the acknowledgment and appreciation you deserve. With practice you can become your own best friend.
Love and gratitude to you,
Bryan
As we shift from being controlled by our complaining critical programs, we get to create more of what "feels good" in our life, but we have to know specifically what we want. What are the "good feelings" we'd like to have and where do they come from?
My experience shows me that people feel good when they're experiencing, expressing or demonstrating love. Not because it makes God happy like many of us were taught, but because the acts of wisdom and love themselves intelligently cultivate a healthy mind, heart and connections with others. So when we demonstrate or receive love, compassion, or support, what do we end up feeling?
It's important for us to know specifically so we can include "the idea" of these feelings in our consciousness. Happiness is very vague so to break it down for myself; happiness is a loving and wise frame of mind that includes many different loving and healthy points of view about self and others. In my opinion there are many good feelings that can inspire happiness, but interestingly we aren't very good at identifying what they are.
If I were to ask you what are the good feelings you like, the common response I get is happiness, joy and orgasm. After that, most people run out of things to say.
If I ask you to describe unhappiness, or feelings you don't like, it would probably be easier. You'd say fear, worry, loneliness, boredom, sadness, pain, anger, impatience, frustration, disappointment, etc...They would be right there in the front of your consciousness because we focus on them and talk about them all the time. We typically don't speak about good feelings in detail to ourselves or to each other, and to change we have to "think" about them as well as include them in our conversations.
I have a very dear friend Shey who spent a week with me recently. She would come out sleepy eyed in the morning and her spirit just pours out with such a beautiful "good morning". It's worth its weight in gold to me. I never get over it and it leaves me smiling many times a day. She also has this very powerful conscious and unconscious habit of stopping and framing the moment, which is a powerful practice.
For instance; She will be sitting there with her cup of coffee, looking out at the flowers and all cuddled up on the couch in a blanket, when all of a sudden she will say, "How nice it is to be sitting here, in such a beautiful place with my dear friend Bryan who I love so much, drinking this warm and amazing cup of coffee." You can see why I'm sad when she leaves.
This caught me by surprise because I had never heard anyone announce out loud a story reflecting the present moment as if it were an entry in a journal or a tweet and she does it in a very playful and self-entertaining way. It made me giggle. I could see it brought her a lot of pleasure and it also grounded in her wisdom to ward off her inner critic, and her story was like a shield of appreciation to keep the possible complaints away.
It was deeply inspiring, effective and fun. It was like being in a musical when all of a sudden one of the characters decides to break out in song, except she was just breaking out into gratitude and appreciation. It's a perfect example of how we need stop and consciously re-frame our world to create good feelings.
We are programmed to frame things in a "news report" kind" of focus. We ask ourselves, "What's wrong, and how it could possibly get worse? This needs to be changed and these proclamations of "the joy of the moment" are a beautiful and intentional act of happiness to make that happen. We need to seek our contentment, inspire it and talk it into existence.
Words of affection, acknowledgment, praise, recognition, complements, acceptance, acknowledgment, humor, support, encouragement, optimism, trust, and are all happiness creators when either given or received.
You will feel; appreciated, respected, loved, safe, worthy, trusted, adequate, meaningful, content, admired, valued, peaceful, connected, grateful, supported, and cared for. And again it's so simple: Giving and receiving love is the answer.
It's been scientifically proven that these positive words and their feelings not only feel good, but are beneficial to the health and evolution of everyone. http://dld.bz/Iam. (The movie)
This is the wisdom we need to remember and practice assertively to make a difference. Please infuse this insight into every point of view you have about yourself until you successfully see yourself as a good enough mother, family member, employee, creator, partner, lover. You need to honor your strengths and forgive your shortcomings, and every self-reference point, as well as every perspective of other people has to be turned into a loving view. It just takes practice, encouragement and guidance and it's here.
As complaints arise they are now your beautiful guides that show you all your critical perspectives that you get to heal. Be excited about them! They can lead you to freedom.
Take a break to day to see yourself with love in whatever roles you play. Frame yourself with the acknowledgment and appreciation you deserve. With practice you can become your own best friend.
Love and gratitude to you,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
The 47th. Another reason to meditate and my tweets.
Hello!
This weekend is possibly yet "another" opportunity to start or better your meditation practice.
Here is a one giant reason why...
It develops the ability for you to be able to take your attention off one thing and intentionally put it on another. This is a highly missed benefit of meditation, and it's what allows you to put the wisdom you have into practice to make a change.
It means the difference between being able to move away from something emotionally and mentally, or staying stuck in it as long as "it" chooses. This is one of our biggest problems. We are so easily pulled away out of our observer into our programming. If you want to turn away from your complaining, critical mind and you can't MOVE ON because you are unable to keep your attention out of your old stories, you will just get pulled right back in.
You have to strengthen your ability to stay in your observer and this is what you do in meditation; Developing the strength and discipline to re-direct your attention. It's indescribably powerful and it is really a true "answer".
If you could choose how long you want to think about a certain thing, instead of the thoughts hanging around and torturing as long as they want, you'd have a great chance at happiness. This is one of the most amazing gifts that a meditation practice can bring you. The results can be amazing, and the more you practice the better it gets.
"The most important experience of my life was learning to meditate"- Deepak Chopra. For detailed meditation guidance: http://dld.bz/Meditate.
Here are my tweets from last week:
Many times we don't have enough information to know how to feel but we believe our feelings anyway. This doesn't seem like a very good idea.
Take 5 minutes to let any critical judgment of the week go. Breathe it out. It was good enough regardless of what your complaining thinks.
When I start to have an opinion l I laugh. I can't see the big picture and I don't know most things. I prefer having an "idea" about it all.
Mindfulness is to have a mind "full" of awareness, not full of our opinions about things. The fewer opinions we have the more present we are.
Can you take 5 minutes to stop and breath? Relax. Look at where you are resisting today, let it go and start over again with more acceptance.
The movie 'I AM" can be life changing! Profound, brilliant, entertaining, full of amazing spiritual/scientific truths. http://iamthemovie.com/
Gratitude, appreciation, wonder, humor, curiosity, admiration. There are so many better things to do with our attention other than complain.
Our negative self-judgment is what we really need to let go of. Everyone has issues, so give yourself a break. Relax. You're doing good enough.
Wishing you a present and peaceful weekend,
Bryan
This weekend is possibly yet "another" opportunity to start or better your meditation practice.
Here is a one giant reason why...
It develops the ability for you to be able to take your attention off one thing and intentionally put it on another. This is a highly missed benefit of meditation, and it's what allows you to put the wisdom you have into practice to make a change.
It means the difference between being able to move away from something emotionally and mentally, or staying stuck in it as long as "it" chooses. This is one of our biggest problems. We are so easily pulled away out of our observer into our programming. If you want to turn away from your complaining, critical mind and you can't MOVE ON because you are unable to keep your attention out of your old stories, you will just get pulled right back in.
You have to strengthen your ability to stay in your observer and this is what you do in meditation; Developing the strength and discipline to re-direct your attention. It's indescribably powerful and it is really a true "answer".
If you could choose how long you want to think about a certain thing, instead of the thoughts hanging around and torturing as long as they want, you'd have a great chance at happiness. This is one of the most amazing gifts that a meditation practice can bring you. The results can be amazing, and the more you practice the better it gets.
"The most important experience of my life was learning to meditate"- Deepak Chopra. For detailed meditation guidance: http://dld.bz/Meditate.
Here are my tweets from last week:
Many times we don't have enough information to know how to feel but we believe our feelings anyway. This doesn't seem like a very good idea.
Take 5 minutes to let any critical judgment of the week go. Breathe it out. It was good enough regardless of what your complaining thinks.
When I start to have an opinion l I laugh. I can't see the big picture and I don't know most things. I prefer having an "idea" about it all.
Mindfulness is to have a mind "full" of awareness, not full of our opinions about things. The fewer opinions we have the more present we are.
Can you take 5 minutes to stop and breath? Relax. Look at where you are resisting today, let it go and start over again with more acceptance.
The movie 'I AM" can be life changing! Profound, brilliant, entertaining, full of amazing spiritual/scientific truths. http://iamthemovie.com/
Gratitude, appreciation, wonder, humor, curiosity, admiration. There are so many better things to do with our attention other than complain.
Our negative self-judgment is what we really need to let go of. Everyone has issues, so give yourself a break. Relax. You're doing good enough.
Wishing you a present and peaceful weekend,
Bryan
To view past inspirations or sign up to receive them;
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
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