As we shift from being controlled by our complaining critical programs, we get to create more of what "feels good" in our life, but we have to know specifically what we want. What are the "good feelings" we'd like to have and where do they come from?
My experience shows me that people feel good when they're experiencing, expressing or demonstrating love. Not because it makes God happy like many of us were taught, but because the acts of wisdom and love themselves intelligently cultivate a healthy mind, heart and connections with others. So when we demonstrate or receive love, compassion, or support, what do we end up feeling?
It's important for us to know specifically so we can include "the idea" of these feelings in our consciousness. Happiness is very vague so to break it down for myself; happiness is a loving and wise frame of mind that includes many different loving and healthy points of view about self and others. In my opinion there are many good feelings that can inspire happiness, but interestingly we aren't very good at identifying what they are.
If I were to ask you what are the good feelings you like, the common response I get is happiness, joy and orgasm. After that, most people run out of things to say.
If I ask you to describe unhappiness, or feelings you don't like, it would probably be easier. You'd say fear, worry, loneliness, boredom, sadness, pain, anger, impatience, frustration, disappointment, etc...They would be right there in the front of your consciousness because we focus on them and talk about them all the time. We typically don't speak about good feelings in detail to ourselves or to each other, and to change we have to "think" about them as well as include them in our conversations.
I have a very dear friend Shey who spent a week with me recently. She would come out sleepy eyed in the morning and her spirit just pours out with such a beautiful "good morning". It's worth its weight in gold to me. I never get over it and it leaves me smiling many times a day. She also has this very powerful conscious and unconscious habit of stopping and framing the moment, which is a powerful practice.
For instance; She will be sitting there with her cup of coffee, looking out at the flowers and all cuddled up on the couch in a blanket, when all of a sudden she will say, "How nice it is to be sitting here, in such a beautiful place with my dear friend Bryan who I love so much, drinking this warm and amazing cup of coffee." You can see why I'm sad when she leaves.
This caught me by surprise because I had never heard anyone announce out loud a story reflecting the present moment as if it were an entry in a journal or a tweet and she does it in a very playful and self-entertaining way. It made me giggle. I could see it brought her a lot of pleasure and it also grounded in her wisdom to ward off her inner critic, and her story was like a shield of appreciation to keep the possible complaints away.
It was deeply inspiring, effective and fun. It was like being in a musical when all of a sudden one of the characters decides to break out in song, except she was just breaking out into gratitude and appreciation. It's a perfect example of how we need stop and consciously re-frame our world to create good feelings.
We are programmed to frame things in a "news report" kind" of focus. We ask ourselves, "What's wrong, and how it could possibly get worse? This needs to be changed and these proclamations of "the joy of the moment" are a beautiful and intentional act of happiness to make that happen. We need to seek our contentment, inspire it and talk it into existence.
Words of affection, acknowledgment, praise, recognition, complements, acceptance, acknowledgment, humor, support, encouragement, optimism, trust, and are all happiness creators when either given or received.
You will feel; appreciated, respected, loved, safe, worthy, trusted, adequate, meaningful, content, admired, valued, peaceful, connected, grateful, supported, and cared for. And again it's so simple: Giving and receiving love is the answer.
It's been scientifically proven that these positive words and their feelings not only feel good, but are beneficial to the health and evolution of everyone. http://dld.bz/Iam. (The movie)
This is the wisdom we need to remember and practice assertively to make a difference. Please infuse this insight into every point of view you have about yourself until you successfully see yourself as a good enough mother, family member, employee, creator, partner, lover. You need to honor your strengths and forgive your shortcomings, and every self-reference point, as well as every perspective of other people has to be turned into a loving view. It just takes practice, encouragement and guidance and it's here.
As complaints arise they are now your beautiful guides that show you all your critical perspectives that you get to heal. Be excited about them! They can lead you to freedom.
Take a break to day to see yourself with love in whatever roles you play. Frame yourself with the acknowledgment and appreciation you deserve. With practice you can become your own best friend.
Love and gratitude to you,
Bryan
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Bryanzerr copyright 2011
click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Twitter:http://twitter.com/KnowComplaints
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
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