I apologize as it's been a couple days, but I'm the moving the rest of my life 400 miles from Sedona to Palm Springs.
Here's the answer to our question, "Is it OK to complain or express negative feelings when you're alone?"
Sure! As long as you;
Do it intentionally and not compulsively. Do it occasionally and not obsessively. Remember it's not you, don't believe it and meet this part of yourself with curiosity. Curiosity is a quality of attention that suspends judgment. It's a very important tool to develop and carry with you constantly.
Verbally expressing your complaints and feelings, is a way you can metabolize the energies of your complaining mind and harmlessly expel its energy. Each time you meet its memories with objective awareness and allowing, you become freer from the old pain. As long as you don't get lost in your negative story, it's healthy to let them out skillfully.
Conscious venting can also inform you. Take your negative ego out for a walk, release its energy, and watch the interaction between you and your complaining mind. Get really familiar with our guest. Information is power. "Be close to your friends, but closer to your complaining mind." It's pretty fascinating once you aren't threatened by it
So why does the complaining, critical and condemning mind exist and why does it seem to be out of our control?"
There is a negative and punishing nature identified as the problem in many self-help models: Ego, shadow, pain body, inner critic, inner child, inner demons.
These all point to a negative influence from memories and feelings, that keeps us from being happy and peaceful, and prevents us from acting in the world with our wisdom and from our hearts.
Our minds remember like computers. We are programmed deeply with the core beliefs we formed as children, which are the crux of most our issues.
Unfortunately, as children we don't question our beliefs. We accept them as our minds form them. We didn't have the discriminating wisdom we do now. These beliefs are accepted as truth, and they become the filter we see and feel the world through. Then they get repeated over and over. They become our unconscious operating system in place today, and continue creating our feelings.
For instance; Mom and dad divorce, kid believes it's his fault because it's always about us as kids, and he feels unbelievably terrible about it. This can result in very low-level self-esteem as an adult if this core belief isn't disbelieved and changed.
Our present moment experience piggybacks off our unconscious core beliefs. Our present negativity is an old program, not the real you. This is why we still have negative thoughts and feelings that we don't want or agree with.
It served us as a child to create a quickly reactive, paranoid, hyper-vigilant program to keep us safe and on our toes. It was a great defense avoiding perceived or real family threats, and tigers in the jungle way back when. But with our developed minds and our present degree of safety we can tone it down. Now we can manage it and change it to meet the present moment.
So it's really quite simple. :) It's just programming. It doesn't have to be a problem and I hope to prove that to you.
Finally, this is a great day to meditate! Check out the instructions from the 12th inspiration. http://dld.bz/Meditate
Wishing you a grateful Sunday. May you appreciate and take pleasure in your gifts.
Peace to you,
Bryan
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click here: http://bryanzerr.com/newspad/default.asp
Bryanzerr copyright 2011
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